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Ernie's House of Whoopass! November 26, 2010
November 26, 2010

Happy Oh My God My Stomach Hurts Day.

Well, Thanksgiving is over and I seem to have escaped with my life. No thanks to Wednesday Addams or Eli Roth, mind you.

Beating A Dead Horse: A really creepy video of the TSA explaining the enhanced pat-downs. Although I'm not sure this bikini girl is wearing his mother's mouth, but at least she can pull off a bikini, as opposed to some other people. Although hey, there's always hope, right?

I don't much give a shit about this bottlecap trick these swimmers can do, I want to know how the hell anyone can hold their breath that long.

Ernie: "Q. What's the difference between a gay and a dead horse? A. It's no fun beating a dead horse." That shit's not funny. I can tolerate your cat aversion but this is fucked up. Not the horse link, the idea that beating a gay is fun. I dropped my LBEH donation in the mail anyway; I won't make them suffer from your insensitivity to gays - this time. Joe

Oh don't get your panties in a twist. If you were signed up for my mailing list, you'd know those two jokes were part of a collection of Random Offensives that I mailed out that morning, blasting pretty much everyone. So yes, I'm going to make an honest effort to get the jokelist rolling again.

Gideons International (also known as Gideon's Bible) is an evangelical Christian organization dedicated to distributing copies of the Bible in over 92 languages and 192 countries of the world, most famously in hotel and motel rooms. The organization was founded in 1899 in Boscobel, Wisconsin, as an early American parachurch organization dedicated to Christian evangelism. It began distributing free Bibles, the work it is chiefly known for, in 1908, when the first Bibles were placed in the rooms of the Superior Hotel in Superior, Montana. Nearly 76.9 million Gideon Scriptures were given out in 2007. Close to 1.5 billion have been distributed since 1908. But I always thought they put the Bible in the nightstand, not on top of it?

Hi Ernie, Was wondering if you could post this on your site and ask your military followers if this is the proper way to shoot an M60? Thanks, Bryan

Yes, I believe it is, and my favorite comment is, "My vibrator weighs 23lbs and has a cyclic rate of 600 rounds per minute."

Movies need you to be scared of the bad guy and impressed by the badass. The method for getting you to buy into this is often the same: by looking the part, and by having other characters go on and on about how badass someone is. But often when it comes time for said badass to actually -- actually fight somebody -- he tends to be profoundly disappointing.

zoom in on top eight ultrahigh-resolution science panoramas.

a closer look at gm's chapter 11 restructuring.

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