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Ernie's House of Whoopass! May 11, 2011
May 11, 2011

Drugs May Be The Road To Nowhere, But At Least They're The Scenic Route. .

Some people have got to be on fucking drugs. They must be. For example: Osama Bin Laden's son, Omar, has denounced the Al Qaeda leader's killing as 'criminal' and said he reserves the right to take legal action against America. In his statement, Omar states, "for it is unacceptable, humanely and religiously, to dispose of a person with such importance and status among his people, by throwing his body into the sea in that way, which demeans and humiliates his family and his supporters and which challenges religious provisions and feelings of hundreds of millions of Muslims."

Huh, that's interesting, because I was just thinking is unacceptable, humanely and religiously, to dispose of people regardless of their importance and status among their people, by COLLAPSING A FUCKING BUILDING ON THEM, which demeans and humiliates their families and their supporters and which challenges religious provisions and feelings of hundreds of millions people. Pretty ironic, eh? But my official response would be to release the photos and the video of the Navy dumping his ass overboard. There's your proof, fuckface.

Possible answer to the "What was used to put the hole in Osamas' head?" question. Chad

Huh, looks like Brandon was spot on. During the recent assault on Osama Bin Laden's compound, reports came out that the Navy SEAL team used dogs and that they had been fitted with titanium teeth. There are several photos going around that contribute to this rumor's quick circulation. Thankfully, the Navy SEALS and other enforcement agencies do not rip out a dog's teeth in order to give him a terrifying grill or superdoggy cyborg. The web rumor that titanium teeth were preferable to the real thing is false. Fact is, they're more like a dental crown, and used when a soldier dog cracks a tooth in the line of duty.

Okay, is this girl really tony or does this Fiat have a huge dashboard?

I always see these trucks around my area and they make me say FUCK YEAH every time. Even more so this week. Dan

Hi Ernie, I probably didn't have to tell you that. But WTF? Was anyone getting hurt? It actually looks extremely harmless . . . boring, in fact. Plus, I wanted to I'd let you know what a Berkeley degree is worth these days. Cheers, Charley in Los Angeles. P.S.--- you never said if you went to the re-launch of the shuttle or not...

Nope, but not for lack of trying. it would be because the next launch attempt has been scheduled for May 16th. Will I make that one? I'm hoping yes, but only time will tell.

With the news that Maria Shriver is separating from Arnold Schwarzenegger after 25 years of marriage, someone put together a gallery of Maria and seven more celebrity cougars. So if you're fantasizing about dating older women, you'll love this gallery. And if you're not, hey that's cool, too. Maybe you can find something else to do like watch the remake of The Incredible Hulk or maybe read something from my Stephen King collection.

My friend Mark B. became a citizen of the U.S. of A. after 11 years of jumping through all the hoops and cutting through all the red tape at immigration. During that time he ended up in a wheelchair from a motorcycle wreck in a club race. He made this photo in celebration. So now even though he's a red-blooded American he's obviously kept his British sense of humor! Huey

Ern, I guess maybe I have a high tolerance - this didn't weird me out, but I've seen plenty of medical/surgical videos. If I ever had a dick related medical emergency I'd *definitely* want someone - male, female, don't care - who knew their shit and wasn't all giggles at the thought of touching my wiener. That being said, I don't speak French, but it sounds like the voiceover says "Cock" an awful lot - does that sound mean something different in French? At the 3:50 - the voiceover pretty clearly says "Normal erection" - I can't imagine what sentence that could fit into except maybe, "This poor bastard will never have to worry about a normal erection again. Every tit jiggle and wet dream between now and the great beyond will be accompanied by a wet ripping sound and Hellraiser-like screaming." I was also thinking, for one horrible moment, the assistant doc was going to try and fold a giraffe out of the guy's inflated meat-saber. J

Dude, you pay way too close attention to cock videos.

Proof that PETA isn't all bad: they convinced George Clooney's girlfriend, Elisabetta Canalis, to strip naked for one of their campaigns. Not that getting her to do so is an incredibly difficult feat, mind you.

sexiest. mechanical. bullride. EVAR.

lying pastor stole his navy seal stories from steven seagal

old and busted: jay leno's car collection. the new hotness: ralph lauren's car collection

the hackers hacked: main anonymous irc servers invaded

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