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E R N I E ' S H O U S E O F W H O O P A S S
LET'S BRING EM HOME 2018 HAS COMPLETED 99 TICKETS SO FAR!
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June 9, 2011 | ||
No, I'm Taking The Day Off. No, I am. No, I am. No, Me. No, Me.You know, at first I was going to take a day off, but I remembered that I can't be out of the office the same day as Ferris Bueller. And since he called out first, here I am. Anyway, Liam Neeson was on my mind this morning. No, not like that, you homo. I had just read that Hollywood has given the full on green light to make a sequel to Taken, which I think is one of the better action movies that's come out in a long time. The whole, "man with a particular set of skills," scene? Outrageously cool, even when done by old people. And I've always felt bad for Neeson ever since his wife Natasha Richardson cashed in her chips after bonking her head. Plus before acting, he used to drive a forklift at the Guinness brewery? Pffft, I'm sold. So over on List Gazette -- where I try to keep most of the Top-X-Lists -- I just highligted an article titled, "10 Great Moments in Liam Neeson Badassery. Oh, and William G. Hillar, a self-proclaimed expert on counter-terrorism who often lectured to US government agencies over 12 years ending in 2011, including the Federal Bureau of Investigation, claimed that the film was based on a real life incident which claimed the life of his daughter. Hillar is not credited in the film's credits, does not appear to have lost a daughter to sex traffickers, and has been exposed as a complete fraud. Do you remember the game Hungry Hungry Hippos from when you were a kid? Do you also remember that old saying, what goes in must come out? Exactly.
I know that as of right now -- well actually as of about two years ago -- my truck would never ever pass a Massachusetts state inspection ever again. Aside from the ABS no longer working -- although its not required to in order to pass inspection -- mechanically it's in tip top shape. From the engine all the way through the entire driveline is solid as a rock. But when I shut the doors, the lower parts of the door skin rattle because the bottoms have rusted apart. When I close the hood, a tiny avalanche of rust bounces down through the front bumper assembly. So far the frame repair I had done last year seems to be holding its own, but I know Big Red has got a finite lifespan thanks to the salty New England winter roads. It gets me kind of bitter when I think about it; the same people who salt the roads that causes the your car to rust, can fail you for having a rusty car. Attention Navy guys. Or, anyone with some maritime experience, I suppose. This ship in the background -- is it the stern of a warship (i.e. the helo deck) or is it a small civilian frighter? I can't tell. The angry drunk's guide to the perfect martini: mix 4 parts gin over 1 part vermouth in a glass of ice, then strain it like a dying relationship. Pour into a cocktail glass shaped like the breast of the woman you love, and cold like her eyes on the day she left. There's no classier method of obliterating your consciousness may be had. Enjoy!
If you don't know who Biba Golic is, you just don't get it, do you? She's a "professional" ping-pong player. She's been referred to as the Anna Kournikova of table tennis, which I'm sure is not meant to praise her abilities. She played at Texas Wesleyan on a table tennis scholarship, which I didn't even know you could do. She's Croatian, she's 33, and she's hot enough to get by on her looks alone. Before you view this last picture, do this. Hold your breath. For as long as you can. Until you see stars. Then try to go a little longer. Just a little longer. Just a little bit. Okay, now click this. what your email address says about you - nfl to lose a reported $1 billion if the preseason is canceled old and busted: 150mph on a motorcycle. the new hotness: 150mph on a motorcycle. buckass naked. |
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