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Ernie's House of Whoopass! July 19, 2011
July 19, 2011

I Didn't Gots Mine Either.

So here's a weird question. Rupert Murdoch's News Corp gets caught with its hand in the phone hacking cookie jar, and four days later his ass is hauled before British Parliment while those directly involved are cooling their heels in jail. So aside from the occasional measles epidemic and their affinity for stupid hats, Britain seems to have their shit together. Yet three months ago Congress issued subpoenas to the BATF regarding Project Gunwalker -- the illegal project that was which was directly responsible for Agent Brian Terry's death -- and we've still got shit to show for it. Why aren't Alberto Gonzales, Michael Mukasey, and Eric Holder all sitting in front of Congress right this very fucking second, given this bullshit has been going on since 2005?

And don't forget, a common myth is that the Founding Fathers were Christian, which is both both true and false. A large number of the Founding Fathers were associated with various sects of the Christian church, including Protestantism and Lutheranism. However, many still openly opposed organized religion. Thomas Jefferson practiced Deism, which contends that reason and observation of the natural world are enough to determine the universe has a creator without the need for organized religion. So if you honestly believe that five Constitutional Amendments come directly from the Bible, well then next you're going to tell me those two little blonde neo-nazi singing bitches, known as Prussian Blue, smoke chronic with the brothers, and that there's scientific evidence smoking unfiltered Chesterfields is good for your throat.

Did you know that freckles are clusters of concentrated melanin which are most often visible on people with a fair complexion. Freckles are predominantly found on the face, although they may appear on any skin exposed to the sun, such as the shoulders, arms, and chest.

There have been endless lists dedicated to the women of ESPN because there are few things on this earth more cherished than the female employees of The Worldwide Leader in Sports. And there's a little something for the ladies, too. Hee, hee, Kit Hoover.

Ernie, I usually don't chime in and add to the pot very often, but something that has been slowly bothering me has to be said. The post today where the upset user is whining about seeing a dead body on your website just blows my mind. My dad turned me on to you probably 4 or 5 years ago, only really contribution has been for the best tits contest, but I can safely say that nothing shocks me on your site anymore. Not that its gotten boring, you just post some crazy shit here. Now to get back to the people who whine about what you post I just really have one thing to say, DON'T FUCKING LOG ON!!!!!!! How could you possibly be offended by a dead body on EHOWA???? Are you fucking kidding me! There could be a picture of my mom getting gang banged and really wouldn't shock me. If you want to not have to "un-see" anything, log on to Disney. But for fucks sake stop whining about it. And Ernie, keep up the good work my friend! -- Emrys

Actually, its funny you say that because I invested some time into the thumbnail preview things -- I can either have an image open up as an overlay like it does is now, or I can thumbnail preview as you pass the mouse over the link, but not both. So it looks like Erick is going to have to use this solution when it comes to the more graphic links. Hint: CBT does not stand for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. You're welcome!

I put together a nice little collection of galleries of the San Fermin Festival -- aka the Running the Bulls -- although I couldn't include photos like this for obvious reasons. Here are more crazy Spanish chicks, if thats your thing.

This had to hurt - Paul

Ernie, I wanted to pass along a new story I thought EHOWA readers might enjoy. After Verifone recently criticized credit card processing company Square for poor security, we sent a guy to see if he could just WALK IN to either of their offices. He managed to casually saunter into the offices of Square, as well as the offices of Verifone -- who at least kicked him out! Second part just went live, hope you can give it a link from EHOWA if it's worthy! -- John

A safety group I subscribe to had the excellent explanation for the Japanese Reactor failure. You might be interested and or find a way to use it -- the file downloads the Power Point presentation, and it's a good one. Very clear. On a related note: Thanks for your hard work. Dave

So holy shit, here's a Kate Upton bikini staring contest. Not kidding, you get to stare at her tits in bikini for 45 seconds.

The original Star Wars trilogy rules, period. The plot is awesome, the characters so memorable that they’ll stay with you for the rest of your life and the effects still put most CGI wannabes in the shade. Yet, while the story carries along like you’re sat in a Landspeeder, and the human element is undoubtedly entertaining, those movies were visual masterpieces first and foremost, and it was the many amazing vehicles that captured our imaginations as much as anything else.

Hey, this Macy's is having a 30% off sale so you better hurry.

naked and gored by a bull is no way to go through life, son. part deux.

nothing to see here. just a fat finnish guy in a dog mask eating mayonnaise. that is all.

the creepy tiger woods connection to elin nordegren’s new boyfriend


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