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Ernie's House of Whoopass! August 5, 2011
August 5, 2011

Will The Real Superman Please Stand Up. ... Oh Wait, My Bad.

It's been a long time since we've been graced with the presence of the REAL Superman. Almost seven years, in fact. I recall watching Superman The Movie quite fondly -- the helicopter crash, saving the airliner, stealing the nuclear missile and the ensuing earthquake -- Gene Hackman played the perfect Lex Luthor, by the way -- and even Superman turning back time. It was the perfect superhero movie. Then Superman II and III were just as big of blockbusters as their predecessor -- remember when Zod threw Superman into a Marlboro truck, and even Office Space paid homage to Superman III. It wasn't until Superman IV that the seemingly infallible franchise would fall flat on its face. And there it lay dormant for 19 years until some tool named Brandon Routh tried to resurrect the character in Superman Returns, but even Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor couldn't save that raging piece of shit. Undaunted by their failures and seeming incapable of learning a simple lesson, Hollywood is indeed trying reboot the franchise again, this time with Man of Steel due out in 2013. I'm just thinking that maybe instead of remaking the remakes that remade the remakes of the originals, maybe they ought to focus their efforts elsewhere, like a good prequel instead?

Okay, been awhile since we've had a nice Friday afternoon game challenge. So gear up for Ball Drop -- I am currently on level 19 of 24 -- since it costs you 50 points for each ball you launch, scores from completed games will trump all others.

Twenty-four year old Zlata was originally an Rhythmic Gymnastics performer, after persistent efforts, and ultimately become a world-renowned contortionist and is known as one of the world's most flexible people. I tried to read more about her on the bio provided on her website, but even the English version is tough to make heads or tails out of. At some point (presumably in her pay section) she gears down as there are some nsfw photos of her out there, too. She also hooked up with a science channel to investigate super human elasticity and they made a video of her climbing inside an MRI machine. It's freaky to watch her pelvis twist like that.

Have a Super Bowl hunch this year? Check out Bodog's football future odds, but I think somebody was high when they gave the Raiders 65:1 odds to win, seems more like it should be 100,000,065:1, amirite?

Ernie, You may not want to publish this, but after seeing the trailer for RED TAILS, this came back to me. A workmate's father was in the Australian Army, he was captured by the Nazis in Crete, and went through a succession of POW camps. Towards the closing months of the war, the krauts were moving vast numbers of pow's further and further away from the advancing allies. An American fighter pilot appeared one day, lets just say, he would have had first hand knowledge of how the Tuskegee boys flew, as he flew with them. For the two weeks before liberation, the Nazi guards beat him up every day, my mate's Father was one of many who attended to his injuries. Then, LIBERATION! The airman was'nt around for a couple of days, he re-appeared, walked to the cell that had 3-4 guards inside, kicked the door in, and gave them some Thompson counselling. He threw the weapon at them, walked away, never to be seen again. Fuckin' brilliant! Stu.

I rewatched the Red Tails trailer from yesterday (man it's fucking awesome) and had to remind myself that while the Tuskegee Airmen certainly exceeded everyone's expectations, not all of the honkey pilots were ball'less wonders. In January 1944, James H. Howard and his squadron of P-51 Mustangs were escorting a formation of American bombers back from a mission to wipe out some aircraft factories near Berlin. While still over Germany, Nazi fighter planes attacked the American formation, and Howard, along with the other escorts, swooped in to defend the bombers. After a short battle, all of the German fighters were either driven off or shot down, but Howard found himself alone, separated from the rest of his squadron. He returned to the bomber formation by himself, only to find the sky swarming with between 30 and 40 German fighters. Rather than wait for the rest of his squadron, or even hesitate for a moment, Howard blazed directly into the heart of the German fighter formation. For the next 30 minutes, Howard viciously attacked the German planes with the astonished bomber crews looking on in awe. He shot down or damaged at least six enemy aircraft and received in return only a single bullet through the wing. Running dangerously low on fuel -- remember this was all happening over Germany -- and with half of his guns jammed, Howard continued to swoop in on the enemy planes and force them away from the bombers before the German aircraft eventually gave up the chase. When Howard returned to his base in the U.K., he didn't tell anyone what had happened. Only after an inquiry by the bomber crews was Howard's identity as the legendary Mustang pilot revealed. In a press conference a few weeks later, a reporter asked Howard why he didn't wait for the rest of his squadron, and his response was -- write this down, because you're going to want to use it any time anyone asks you why you did anything -- "He who rides a tiger cannot dismount."

Absinthe is historically described as a distilled, highly alcoholic beverage. It is an anise-flavoured spirit derived from herbs, including the flowers and leaves of the herb Artemisia absinthium, commonly referred to as "grande wormwood", together with green anise and sweet fennel. Absinthe traditionally has a natural green colour but can also be colorless. Absinthe has been portrayed as a dangerously addictive psychoactive drug. The chemical thujone, present in small quantities, was blamed for its alleged harmful effects. By 1915, absinthe had been banned in the United States and in most European countries including France, the Netherlands, Belgium, Switzerland and the Austro-Hungarian Empire. In 2007 the French Lucid brand became the first genuine absinthe to receive a COLA (Certificate of Label Approval) for importation into the United States since 1912, following independent efforts by representatives from Lucid and Kübler to topple the long-standing U.S. ban. In December 2007, St. George Absinthe Verte, produced by St. George Spirits of Alameda, California, became the first brand of absinthe produced in the United States since the ban.

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