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Ernie's House of Whoopass! December 16, 2011
December 16, 2011

I'm Not Saying Whistler is Bad, I'm Just Saying I'd Prefer His Daughter..

Country music legend and Air Force veteran Willie Nelson introduces his great friend Kris Kristofferson who makes an emotional speech accepting the Veteran Of The Year Award. Also relevant. Also creepy.

Masking tape is a type of pressure sensitive tape made of a thin and easy-to-tear paper, and an easily released pressure sensitive adhesive. It is available in a variety of widths. It is used mainly in painting, to mask off areas that should not be painted. The adhesive is the key element to its usefulness, as it allows the tape to be easily removed without leaving residue or damaging the surface to which it is applied. The tape is available in several strengths, rated on a 1–100 scale based on the strength of the adhesive. House painter's tape is rated by how many days it can be left up without leaving residue on the surface being masked. It is available in 1, 3, 7, 14, 30, and 60-day ratings, with the 7- and 14-day tapes being the most common. The longer-rated tapes are typically less adhesive, and are sold for use on smooth, delicate surfaces such as vinyl wallpaper and recently painted walls. In any case, the tape should be removed immediately after painting regardless of how long it was left up beforehand. Painter's tape is often blue in color as opposed to the tan household masking tape. Spraying WD-40 is a popular way to remove the sticky residue.

Here is Maxim's Christmas wish for you. Want a hint? Okay, it begins with a B and ends with a O-U-N-C-I-N-G-B-O-O-B-S. You're welcome.

Kanellos the Riot Dog has been seen in every single riot in Greece for over a decade now. Notice I said "a riot dog" up there: That's because Kanellos is only one of three potential riotous canines. There's also Thodoris and Loukanikos, who are often mistaken for Kanellos because they have similar coloring, and all wear the same blue collar (that's not a conspiracy; it just signifies that a dog is current on its shots in the city of Athens). If you're a little disappointed upon learning that the Riot Dog was not just one remarkable pup born with an innate love of tear gas only rivaled by his inherent dislike for The Man, take heart: The other riot dogs -- Thodoris and Loukanikos -- are most likely Kanellos' pups, carrying on his legacy. That's right: Much like brachycephaly and hip dysplasia, intolerance for social injustice is a hereditary trait.

Petrol or Gasoline is a toxic, translucent, petroleum-derived liquid that is primarily used as a fuel in internal combustion engines. It consists mostly of organic compounds obtained by the fractional distillation of petroleum, enhanced with a variety of additives. Some gasolines also contain ethanol as an alternative fuel. In North America, the term gasoline is often shortened in colloquial usage to gas, whereas most current or former Commonwealth nations use the term petrol. Gasoline is more volatile than diesel oil, Jet-A, or kerosene, not only because of the base constituents, but also because of additives. Volatility is often controlled by blending with butane, which boils at -0.5 °C. The volatility of gasoline is determined by the Reid vapor pressure (RVP) test. The desired volatility depends on the ambient temperature. In hot weather, gasoline components of higher molecular weight and thus lower volatility are used. In cold weather, too little volatility results in cars failing to start. Like other alkanes, gasoline burns in a limited range of its vapor phase and, coupled with its volatility, this makes leaks highly dangerous when sources of ignition are present.

Speaking of, this Super Fire Foam Protector shit is pretty amazing -- skip to 2:40 for some real holy shit footage as a guy takes a blowtorch to his hand.

The L'Oréal Group is the world's largest cosmetics and beauty company. With its registered office in Paris and head office in the Paris suburb of Clichy, Hauts-de-Seine, France, it has developed activities in the field of cosmetics. Concentrating on hair colour, skin care, sun protection, make-up, perfumes and hair care, the company is active in the dermatological and pharmaceutical fields and is the top nanotechnology patent-holder in the United States. The company's flagship hair care product -- marketed as Vive Pro in North America and Evital in Europe -- is recommended by the hair experts. Infusing hair with a pearl protein complex that captures and reflects light, while softening every strand.

Hey Ernie, Here is a new documentary I made. (I'm the guy who found that roll of film in Brooklyn that you may have reported on it). I went to Costa Rica to find adventure, I did not expect to find adorable yawning monkey babies. I think you'll like it. Best, Todd

Hey Ernie! I read your site everyday and am a LBEH contributor when I can. I snapped this pic in Lexington, KY the other day and thought you would get a kick out of it! Enjoy! -Matt

Hey Ernie, Not sure if anyone else has pointed this out but I was just catching up on my EHOWA fix when I couldn't help but notice that on the picture you posted on the 13th (hotspacealbumarttribute) that the cat in the right hand corner has its face blured. Thought it was a bit odd that someone chose to suppress the identity of their dear tabby and nothing else. Love the work, keep doing what you do best. Patrick.

Bratz is an American line of fashion dolls and merchandise manufactured by MGA Entertainment. Four original 10" dolls were released in 2001 - Cloe, Jade, Sasha and Yasmin. They are portrayed as teenagers distinguished by large heads and skinny bodies, almond-shaped eyes adorned with eyeshadow, and lush, glossy lips. Bratz reached great success and the original line of dolls was expanded with a number of spin-offs like Bratz Kidz and Bratz Babyz, as well as media featuring the Bratz characters, including a movie, tv series, music albums and video games. In 2005, global sales were two billion dollars and by 2006 Bratz had about forty percent of the fashion-doll market. Bratz have provoked controversy in several areas. Criticism has been leveled at the labor conditions under which the dolls are manufactured in China, and the American Psychological Association has expressed concern about the sexualization of the dolls' clothing and its effect on children. Since 2005 MGA Entertainment has been involved in a lengthy legal dispute with Mattel over the rights to the Bratz design.

There's little better than low-budget barrel-scraper movies for inciting the snorting derision of stoned teenagers going through an "ironic" stage. Nor is there anything that usually sucks quite as much. With this in mind, we felt it was high time we directed our collective gaze at our favorite movies from that most treasured of monster and horror movie sub-genres, the "versus" film!

Another opulent tea set is the silver tea service, a formal tea set with serving pieces made of sterling silver. A silver tea service is an expensive tea set. It is usually the household's best and is used following formal dinners, or at a tea party. A silver tea service is always presented on a tray. While a set of teaspoons is a necessity, as is a sugar spoon or sugar tongs, cutlery is not included as part of the tea service. In larger silver services, a silver coffeepot is sometimes included to form what is termed a tea and coffee service. In a very formal household, the tea service is cared for by the footman, under the supervision of the butler, who is responsible for the household silver.

At an uphill snowmobile competition in Switzerland, a rider just about makes it to the top before he and his snowmobile tumble down the entire mountain.

A safety reflector is a retroreflector intended for pedestrians, runners, bicyclists, motorcyclists, and vehicles. A safety reflector is similar to reflective stripes that can be found on safety vests and clothing worn by road workers and rescue workers. They are sometimes erroneously called luminous badges or luminous tags, but this is incorrect as they do not themselves produce light, but only reflect it. A safety reflector helps to make a person or vehicle visible to other people and vehicles on the road up to three times further away than without a reflector, since it reflects light from headlights of an oncoming vehicle. Safety reflectors are commonly used on bicycles, motorcycles, helmets, cars, RVs, boats, backpacks, skateboards and clothing. They are especially useful in rural areas where there are no streetlights.

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