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Ernie's House of Whoopass! February 24, 2012
February 24, 2012

I'm Going To Guess What You're Thinking About... ... ... Is it Boobs?

The Cuba Libre is a highball made of cola, lime, and white rum. This highball is often referred to as a Rum and Coke in the United States, Canada, the UK and Ireland, where the lime juice is optional. Accounts of the invention of the Cuba Libre vary. One account claims that the drink (Spanish for Free Cuba) was invented in Havana, Cuba around 1901/1902. Patriots aiding Cuba during the Spanish-American War—and, later, expatriates avoiding Prohibition—regularly mixed rum and cola as a highball and a toast to this West Indies island. The Cuba Libre gained popularity in the United States after the Andrews Sisters recorded a song (in 1945) named after the drink's ingredients, "Rum and Coca-Cola". Cola and rum were both cheap at the time and this also contributed to the widespread popularity of the concoction.

A tip (also called a gratuity) is a sum of money tendered to certain service sector workers for a service performed or anticipated. Such payments and their size are a matter of social custom. Tipping varies among cultures and by service industry. Though a tip is seldom required, and its amount is usually at the discretion of the patron being served, in some circumstances failing to give an adequate tip when one is expected is a serious faux pas, and may be considered very miserly, a violation of etiquette, or unethical. In some other cultures or situations, giving a tip is not expected and offering one would be considered at best odd and at worst condescending or demeaning.

K-Swiss was founded in 1966 in Los Angeles, California, by the two Swiss brothers Art and Ernie Brunner who became interested in tennis after immigrating to the United States, where they introduced the first leather tennis shoes. Steven Nichols owns a little over 22% of the K-Swiss company (2006). His son David Nichols is the company's Executive Vice President since 1995 and President of Europe Operations. In July 2011, an advertising video was released wherein the fictional character Kenny Powers was reported to have "purchased" 51% of K-Swiss stock, thus making him Kenny Powers: Muthafuckin CEO! And of course if you want need more Kenny Fuckin' Powers, here are the best scenes from Seasons 1 & 2.

Throughout the history of Native Americans, how to braid hair has always been a significant part of their culture. For some, braiding was simply an ornamental way to style their hair, especially for the women and children. In some Native America cultures, the men would wear braids in their hair because it had some religious meaning or they were preparing for a battle. In some of the Native American Indian tribes, knowing how to braid hair was an essential part of their life. Wearing braids could signify the status of someone in the tribe. Sometimes, only the medicine man or chief could wear braids. Other times, young warriors would braid their hair and adorn the plaits with feathers, beads or leather. Still, for some tribes of Indians, only the women could have long hair, so they were the only ones who could braid.

Hey Ern, Here is the latest Hitler in a Rage video about Mitt Romney and his dog. I love these things. Now, let me drink in today's roast beef sammich. Eric

Colgate is an oral hygiene product line of toothpastes, toothbrushes, mouthwashes and dental floss. Colgate Ribbon Dental Cream was the first toothpaste in a collapsible tube, introduced in 1896, when it had previously been sold in glass jars since 1873. Present in India since the 1930s, Colgate is almost synonymous with toothpaste in the Indian market. It is accepted well both in the rural and urban areas. It has been ranked as the 17th most trusted brand in India by The Brand Trust Report. Colgate Total contains the anti-microbial ingredient triclosan, which reduces the bacteria that cause gingivitis, cavities and halitosis.

The Mercury Program was the first manned U.S. space program. But as NASA was still finding their groove with manned spaceflights, they wanted to make sure that as little as possible could go wrong by human error. So they made everything so automated that the astronauts had little to do with anything, hence the less-than-flattering nickname of the astronauts involved: "Spam in a can." Of course, that shit was over the second Gordon Cooper came along. Astronaut Cooper was the Spam du jour on Mercury-Atlas 9. It was the program's final mission, and everyone was feeling pretty relaxed, seeing as all the other ones had gone off without a hitch. NASA launched Cooper into orbit on May 15, 1963 -- one month after Earl was born, BTW -- and everything was indeed going nicely ... for the first 19 orbits, anyway. When the 20th came along, Cooper suddenly lost all altitude, orientation and attitude readings. This was bad, but still somewhat manageable. During the very next orbit, Cooper lost his entire automatic stabilization and control systems, without which a safe, non-flambeed return to Earth's atmosphere would be, in scientific terms, balls-out impossible. To further make the situation seem like some warped game show, he also noticed that the air inside his capsule was getting full of carbon dioxide. Improvising, he made like a 17th century sailor and approximated his position from the star formations. Then, using nothing but his wristwatch, he calculated the time he needed to fire the retro-rockets for reentry. Yes, the fate of an entire spacecraft relied on a wristwatch. Upon entering Earth's atmosphere, Cooper found out that his desperation move was just as impossible as it seemed, and promptly burned to a crisp. Ha-ha, just kidding! He actually wound up making the most accurate splashdown in the history of the Mercury Program. STAY IN SCHOOL, KIDS.

An elliptical trainer or cross-trainer is a stationary exercise machine used to simulate stair climbing, walking, or running without causing excessive pressure to the joints, hence decreasing the risk of impact injuries. For this reason, people with some injuries are able to use an elliptical to stay fit, as the low impact affects them little. Elliptical trainers offer a non-impact cardiovascular workout that can vary from light to high intensity based on the speed of the exercise and the resistance preference set by the user. Elliptical trainers first entered the market in the 1990s. A more compact elliptical trainer was invented by Larry D. Miller for Precor and was patented in 2004. Miller created the idea for the machine by filming his daughter running alongside a car, while watching the motion of her legs. His idea was to take that exact motion and put it into a machine that puts less strain on the joints.

Ernie, another hottie gets busted with a student. Her booking photo doesn’t look near so good as her desk photo. But let’s be honest, you’d still hit it. Call me an asshole, but I still don’t see this the same way if a male teacher did it to a female student. At 15, I was happy to have sex with anyone besides myself. -----Martin

A rosé is a type of wine that has some of the color typical of a red wine, but only enough to turn it pink. The pink color can range from a pale orange to a vivid near-purple, depending on the grapes and wine making techniques. In the early 1970s, demand for white wine exceeded the availability of white wine grapes, so many California producers made "white" wine from red grapes, in a form of saignée production with minimal skin contact, the "whiter" the better. In 1975, Sutter Home's "White Zinfandel" wine experienced a stuck fermentation, a problem in which the yeast dies off before all the sugar is turned to alcohol. Winemaker Bob Trinchero put it aside for two weeks, then upon tasting it he decided to sell this pinker, sweeter wine. Rosé has now exceeded white wines in sales and is unrelated with the degree of alcohol, so that this latter can be relatively high for a wine.

Buried somewhere underneath a sports world flooded with political correctness and sensitivity issues is a group of badass beauties climbing their way to the top. From homewreckers and fighters to loudmouths and provocative presences, these women have no qualms about "keeping it real," to quote the legendary Dave Chappelle. Angry, fearless and determined to survive, this rebellious, yet sexy crew has yet to avoid an entertained paparazzi that is always eager for more. Well, we've clearly got more right here, as we're about to look at the sexiest bad girls in sports, starting with Traci Lynn Johnson who was so hot, she stole Tiki Barber away from his pregnant-with-twins wife. Doh!

I'm usually pretty imaginative about such things, but this one has me pretty speechless.

old and busted: rock, paper, scissors. the new hotness: rock, paper, scissors, BALLS

spider vs wasp: a deadly battle in pictures

remember the guy who photoshops celebs into his holiday party pics? 2011 edition



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