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Ernie's House of Whoopass! June 11, 2012
June 11, 2012

Is It Sad That I Have All The Local Happy Hour Times Mapped Out?

The 5-toed feet of a gecko are covered with elastic hairs called setae and the end of these hairs are split into nanoscale structures called spatulae. The sheer abundance and proximity to the surface of these spatulae make it sufficient for van der Waals forces alone to provide the required adhesive strength. Geckos have no difficulty mastering vertical walls and are apparently capable of adhering themselves to just about any surface, except Boston Terriers. Following the discovery of the gecko’s adhesion mechanism in 2002, which is based on van der Waals forces, biomimetic adhesives have become the topic of a major research effort. Synthetic setae emulate the setae found on the toes of a gecko and scientific research in this area is driven towards the development of dry adhesives.

A orthopedic cast is a shell, frequently made from plaster, encasing a limb (or, in some cases, large portions of the body) to hold a broken bone(s) in place until healing is confirmed. It is similar in function to a splint. Plaster bandages consist of a cotton bandage that has been impregnated with plaster of paris, which hardens after it has been made wet. Plaster of Paris is calcined Gypsum, ground to a fine powder by milling. When water is added, the more soluble form of calcium sulfate returns to the relatively insoluble form, and heat is produced. Nowadays bandages of synthetic materials are often used, often knitted fiberglass bandages impregnated with polyurethane, sometimes bandages of thermoplastic. These are lighter and dry much faster than plaster bandages. However, plaster can be more easily moulded to make a snug and therefore more comfortable fit. In addition, plaster is much smoother and does not snag clothing or abrade the skin.

What's the best way to sell t-shirts? Why just have porn star Sunny Leone model them for you, duh!

For all the insane amount of work James Cameron put into getting the Titanic to look just right, he didn't seem to give much of a crap about how he portrayed the real people in it. William Murdoch was really the name of the first officer of the Titanic, but other than that, they are completely different people: Not only was he not a coward and a murderer, but he actually saved people's lives. There's even a plaque to his memory in his hometown in Scotland, where he's remembered as a hero. According to historians, Murdoch did everything possible to save people, guiding them to lifeboats and throwing deck chairs overboard for those in the water to cling to. He didn't commit suicide -- he drowned doing his job. If he did shoot a pistol it was into the air and only to stop a potential riot. As for the bribe: That isn't even an exaggeration of anything, it's just completely made up. So, sometimes they change things for good reason -- and other times they just flat-out lie and make real people look like evil, cowardly, petty douchebags for the heck of it.

"Fuck tha Police" is a protest song by the gangsta rap group N.W.A that appears on the album Straight Outta Compton. Despite not being a single, it ranked #425 on Rolling Stone's list of the 500 Greatest Songs of All Time. The song even provoked the FBI to caution N.W.A's record company about the lyrics. Since its release in 1988, the Fuck the Police slogan continues to influence pop culture today in the form of t-shirts, artwork, and even transitions into other genres as seen in Rage Against the Machine's version.

Closed captioning is the process of displaying text on a television, video screen or other visual display to provide additional or interpretive information to individuals who wish to access it. Closed captions typically show a transcription of the audio portion of a program as it occurs (either verbatim or in edited form), sometimes including non-speech elements. The term "closed" in closed captioning indicates that not all viewers see the captions—only those who choose to decode or activate them. This distinguishes from "open captions", which are visible to all viewers. In the United States and Canada, these terms do have different meanings, however: subtitles assume the viewer can hear but cannot understand the language or accent, or the speech is not entirely clear, so they only transcribe dialogue and some on-screen text. Captions aim to describe to the deaf and hard of hearing all significant audio content—spoken dialogue and non-speech information such as the identity of speakers and, occasionally, their manner of speaking—along with music or sound effects using words or symbols.

Greetings Ernie! Being a big hockey fan (Philadelphia Flyers) I always enjoy watching the Stanley Cup. I learned last night the best thing about watching a Hockey game in LA? The Silicone of Course! Cheers! Jay

Photos of the Fin Project -- [the plaque - the fins] -- sent in by Clarence

Get some really great deals on brand name ammunition -- new stuff, too, not reloaded crap that will blow your gun up.

The DePaul Blue Demons are the intercollegiate athletic teams of DePaul University, located in Chicago Illinois. The Blue Demons participate in NCAA Division I and have been a member of the Big East Conference since 2005. They were not affiliated with any circuit until it helped establish the Great Midwest Conference in 1991. It subsequently became a charter member of Conference USA from 1995 until its move to the Big East. The origin of the Blue Demons nickname dates back to 1907 when the university changed its name from St. Vincent's College to its current form. At the time, the athletic teams had red uniforms with a large "D" on the front. After an announcer referred to the players as the "D-men," the moniker stuck and eventually evolved into "Demons."

While there are many taboo subjects dealt with in horror movies, there’s something uniquely disturbing about cannibalism. Cannibals can be played for laughs, but when portrayed seriously they can be very sickening indeed. Quid pro quo, Clarice. Quid pro quo.

The Bronze Age is a period characterized by the use of copper and its alloy bronze as the chief hard materials in the manufacture of some implements and weapons. Chronologically, it stands between the Stone Age and Iron Age. The term Stone Age implies the inability to smelt any ore, the term Bronze Age implies the inability to smelt iron ore and the term Iron Age implies the ability to manufacture artifacts in any of the three types of hard material. Their arrangement in the archaeological chronology reflects the difficulty of manufacture in the history of technology.

Just like humans, sometimes animals don’t get along with one another either. Whether it is their own species or something completely too big for them to fight, these animals are fearless warriors relenting to nothing. As fights may sometimes get dangerous, when it’s animals doing it, things immediately become a lot more comical.

Maybe you can explain why it is, when one of your readers comes across something like this, that the letters E-H-O-W-A with flashing lights instantly appears in our thoughts before anything else has a chance to? Not sure why they didn't take it down. Maybe it's left there to serve as a reminder to the inmates at the Strafford County Department of Corrections not to fuck with the fence. Looks like maybe a week old. As always love the site. -Don

Dear Ernie, Thanks for posting the link to Jenny McCarthy Body Count. I run into these morons frequently enough to need that link. Thanks again. Steve

Track lighting is a method of lighting where light fixtures are attached anywhere on a continuous track device which contains electrical conductors. This is as opposed to the routing of electrical wiring to individual light positions. Tracks can be mounted to ceilings or walls, lengthwise down beams, or crosswise across rafters or joists. They can also be hung with rods from especially high places like vaulted ceilings. Modern systems are available with low voltage (10, 12, or 24 volts respectively) running through track, which is in itself decorative. In this case, the fixture may clamp onto a track made of two metal strips separated with an insulating strip. Two-circuit configurations are rare in such systems. The track is powered by a transformer which converts the high voltage into low voltage. There are magnetic and electronic transformers.

The Bilderberg conference is an annual, unofficial, invitation-only conference of approximately 120 to 140 guests from North America and Western Europe, most of whom are people of influence. About one-third are from government and politics, and two-thirds from finance, industry, labour, education and communications. Meetings are closed to the public and the 2012 meeting was held at the Westfields Marriott located in Chantilly, Virginia, United States. Out of (morbid?) curiosity, someone showed up to film and interview the protesters; these are their replies.

Old and busted: Mae Klong railway market Thailand. The new hotness: Jakarta's track slum in Indonesia.

neil degrasse tyson gives prometheus crap for shitty math

the 21 most distracting fans in sports (higher numbers require some eye bleach)

amelia earhart mystery solved: she died on a pacific island

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

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