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Ernie's House of Whoopass! March 22, 2013
March 22, 2013

Actually It's Nine States Now, So I Wonder If They have Updates Photos?

The traditional colors of Mardi Gras are purple, green, and gold. These colors are said to have been chosen by Grand Duke Alexis Alexandrovitch Romanoff of Russia during a visit to New Orleans in 1872. This doctrine was reaffirmed in 1892, when the Rex Parade theme "Symbolism of Colors" gave the three colors their meanings: purple for justice, gold for power, and green for faith. In his book "Krewe: The Early New Orleans Carnival: Comus to Zulu," Errol Laborde shows the above mentioned meanings of the Mardi Gras colors to be false. He gives a much simpler origin, having to do primarily with looking good.

Continuing to both impress me and at the same time make me scream, "YOU STOLE MY FUCKING LIFE!" Tiger Woods is not dating Lindsey Vonn. So in celebration of this love/hate relationship, let's take a look back at the 15 hottest girlfriends mistresses of Tiger Woods. Although to be honest, I'm as confused by Mindy Lawton as you are.

Satellite television is television programming delivered by the means of communications satellite and received by an outdoor antenna, usually a parabolic reflector generally referred to as a satellite dish, and as far as household usage is concerned, a satellite receiver either in the form of an external set-top box or a satellite tuner module built into a TV set.

The people at tuning firm Anderson Germany have selected the Bentley Continental GT coupe as their next project. The Continental GT's normally 567-horsepower engine is now a 671-horsepower monster after Anderson Germany has worked their magic on it.

Just like everything else, though, motorcycle windshields have advantages and disadvantages. One advantage to having motorcycle windshields is that it blocks the wind and makes for a better and more comfortable ride. Another advantage is the aerodynamics of motorcycle windshields. They allow the air to flow evenly up and over the motorcycle. Having better aerodynamics with windshields can improve gas mileage and with the gas prices sky rocketing, any amount saved in gas is always an advantage.

Hey Ernie, I have a question about the AR-15 that you may be able to shine some light on. It seems AR-15 is very popular, more so due to the [Sandy Hook] shooting, as people are trying to get them just in case they make them illegal/etc. However, my curiosity strikes me when you can also buy other assault rifles such as the PS90, FS2000, ACR, and M&P15 that are all for civilian use. Why such the focus on the AR-15? Is the AR-15 more bang for the buck, so to speak? Keep up the good work, Ricky

Many people have the misconception that the AR in AR-15 stands for Assault Rifle. This is not true; the AR stands for ARmalite, the company which first conceived the AR-15 design, before selling it to Colt who went on to manufacture M-16's for the US gov'mint. Colt then started selling the semi-automatic version of the M16 rifle -- known as the Colt AR-15 -- for civilian sales in 1963. Although the name "AR-15" remains a Colt registered trademark, it's used in everyday gun speak to refer to various flavors of modern sporting rifles, much the way, "Go Xerox those pages," means to make copies or, "I'm going to Google the answer," means to research something online. So to use your example, the Smith and Wesson M&P 15 ($1,159) is an AR-15 style rifle, as is the Bushmaster ACR ($2,499) and a shit ton of others. Prices on an AR can range anywhere from the Walmart grade DPMS Sportical which sells for $599 -- I sold one to some asshole for $1,150 during the Sandy Hook Craze, haha -- up to the Heckler and Koch MR556 which will set you back at least $3,295. Keep in mind that aside from some tweaking here and there, a wide chasm in both build quality and reliability, all of these rifles function more or less the same. It's like how the word sedan can be used to describe a Chevy Lumina or a BMW 7-series.

The FNH PS90 you mentioned isn't quite what I would call an AR. Both it and its counterpart, the Five-seveN pistol -- are both chambered to fire the smaller 5.7x28mm cartridge which is designed to defeat body armor. A friend has one and I found it very... ... ... unique. And quite impractical since ammunition was tough to find before Sandy Hook, so now? Fucking forget about it [1 - 2 - 3] it's impossible to lay your hands on in any meaningful quantities. Now FNH's FS2000 -- they sure do like to build some weird looking shit, don't they? -- is kind of a cross between the funky ass looks of the PS90 with the functionality of an AR. Its bullpup design meaning the trigger is forward of the action, instead of below/behind it. FS2000's have always kind of given me the heebie jeebies because when you're shooting it, the action is right there next to your cheek (black flap) so if something goes wrong and shit blows up, your good looks are going right along with it. Having said that, I missed out on this used one for under $1,200 and I've never forgiven myself.

So I'm fucking out, he's fucking in: Danny McBride is on the cover of Funny Or Die's Digital Humor Magazine.

hey Ernie, have you seen this? Insane Office Escape 2 - Chris

All Aboard Amtrak! Except EHOWA...blocked by their WIFI on the BOS - NYC Acela. Brian

Patience, my young padawan. When you want to get to EHOWA, do. Or do not. There is no try. And while you're on that Amtrak, here's video of a freight train through an F3 toronado. Shit gets real about the 1 minute mark and then gets even more realz 30 seconds later.

Anyway, I suspect this woman is from either England or Alabama, although I'm not sure which.

please help me: i do not know if i can wait for tomorrow (fake vid, real message) (and real mole)

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

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