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Ernie's House of Whoopass! May 16, 2013
May 16, 2013

Dude. This Was Supposed To Be A Touchless Car Wash.

Finally, an energy drink marketed towards the female consumer -- and they do it so well. In our street tests, this product was selected by almost every female respondent. The design is clean, attractive, and simple -- again, very different than most of the products that are out there pushing aggressive, sexual, or offensive images.

The space tourism industry may be offering people the chance to travel miles above the Earth, but if you'd prefer to be beneath our planet's surface, you're in luck, as subterranean hotels are also appealing to the public to spend their holidays underground. Presenting the opportunity to try something new and exciting, their novelty factor could also make them stand out in a crowded marketplace. From repurposed secret military bases and nuclear bunkers to reclaimed caves and converted mines, these 13 amazing subterranean hotels may give the term underground economy a whole new meaning.

Flip-flops are a type of open-toed sandal typically worn in casual situations, such as outside or at the beach. They consist of a flat sole held loosely on the foot by a Y-shaped strap that passes between the first and second toes and around either side of the foot. They may also be held to the foot with a single strap over the front of the foot rather than a thong. The name flip-flop originated because of the sound that is made by slapping between the sole of the foot and the floor when walking.

So we're only six weeks into the 2013 MLB season, and already we've seen umpires blow a number of calls that have had real impacts on the outcomes of games. Are the umpires somehow worse than they used to be? Probably not. The increase in the number of bad calls probably has more to do with our ability to perceive them -- things like HD television and pitch-trackers -- than a decline in umpiring ability. Still, that doesn't make them any easier for fans to swallow, and it certainly does feel like expanded use of instant replay is just over the horizon.

A fallen foot arch, also known as "Pes Planus," is when the arch of your foot collapses and makes contact with the ground. If you allow a fallen arch to go untreated, it can cause you greater problems in the long term, such as knee pain, shin splints, and inflammation of the Achilles tendon. There are many bandage wraps on the market that can be purchased over the counter to treat Pes Planus. If using the over the counter wraps do not prove effective, you should consult your health care provider for custom treatment.

Hi Ernie, I was friends with a Marine that told me shitloads about Embassy Security. To try and turn it into an indictment against a presidential administration is bullshit. (For the record, I am apolitical, i.e. no agenda). First of all, embassy security is managed by the Marine Corps. It is considered within the Corps a premiere job. You have to pass a series of written and physical tests to become one. He revealed to me that the written tests amount to "How un-caring can you be to anybody outside?" Second, if the security at that embassy asked for more security, it should have gone through the Marines. Asking for more security at an embassy through the administration is kind of like asking your priest to ask your Mom if you can have a popsicle. I'm not saying mistakes weren't made. The Marine guard should have been doubled. They should have had an ASSLOAD of ammo and crowd control supplements. (My belief is that they were forced to retract due to suppression of fire). Likewise, the safe room they had should have had an independent supply of air, since they all only died from smoke inhalation after retreating to a locked room. The only political beef is about "the cover-up". But fuck if you don't publicly delve into what the defenses of all our embassies are. There just needs to be a behind-closed-doors assurance that Marine security is properly reviewed and maintained. That's my 2 cents. Cheers, Charley

I don't believe the controversy isn't that an embassy was attacked -- that kind of shit has been going on for some 60 years -- but that the embassy was attacked for several hours while the powers that be did nothing to stop it. This is the equivalent of a family of four calling 911 during a home invasion. And when they ask the 911 operator for help, they're put on hold. So they hang up and call 911 again. And again. And again. Local police units who are nearby want to respond but are instead instructed to stay on traffic duty. Despite the parent's best efforts, eventually the home invaders overwhelm them and both the two parents and their two children are killed. Now eight months later, they release the 911 tapes and we're supposed to be satisfied with that. Now we have home invasions here every day, that's not news. People kill other people every day, that's not news, either. And if despite their best efforts the cops respond as quickly as they can, but are still too late to save the victims, we don't blame the cops and demand an investigation. That's just life. But when someone in mortal danger calls 911... for TWO HOURS and those who are supposed to protect and serve willingly do nothing and people die because of that inaction? That's pretty spectacular and newsworthy. That deserves our attention and that the appropriate parties -- be they military or civilian -- be held accountable.

My advice to the BHO fanboys is the same to the GWB fanboys from 8 years ago: The Buck Stops Here. Make decisions based upon shitty intelligence? Tough shit, it's your administration and your responsibility. FEMA botch the federal relief of a national disaster? Tough shit, it's your administration and your responsibility. CIA agent's identity revealed as political retribution? Tough shit, it's your administration and your responsibility. Foreign nations tortured at a prison that your troops set up and photos leaked online? Tough shit, it's your administration and your responsibility. Have more service members die after you claimed Mission Accomplished than before? Tough shit, it's your administration and your responsibility. The same is equally applicable here. Like it or not, someone's fucked the dog at Benghazi and their lack of action resulted in four American deaths. That someone needs to be held accountable for that. The Internal Revenue Service has been turned into a political weapon... "and we apologize." Are you KIDDING ME? And now the illegal AP breach that I'm sure Holder will claim no knowledge of, just like Fast and Furious... wink, wink. And yes, well aware that Obama may or may not have had prior knowledge of these acts. But guess what? Tough shit, it's your administration and your responsibility.

Old and busted: before/after PHOTOS of porn stars without makeup. The new hotness: before/after VIDEO of porn stars without makeup.

Ern, I love dogs as much as the next guy, unless this guy is the next guy, then I love them way more. I personally have a couple dogs, and have had or known many many more. Not even sure where I got this link today, but I figured you needed to see it. If I actually got it off you, sorry to fill up your mailbox. I checked for the link in the last few posts, but didn't see it. Kind of appalling really, seems to celebrate when the police shoot someone's dog, or someone hurts or kills a dog, or someone is hurt or killed by a dog. Jeff

This is from the next town over. All I have to say is, if these guys don't loose their jobs, I'm moving. Ryan

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil. For thou art with me. Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life. Because I carry a big stick and I'm the meanest mother fucker in the valley! Two sharks down, Lord! One demon fish to go! Can I get an Amen?

Eh, not a bad price on condoms, 1€ each or 3 for 2€. Although I bet Ron Swanson Nick Offerman could get a better deal.

In urinary catheterization flexible tube known as a urinary catheter is inserted into a patient's bladder via the urethra. Catheterization allows the patient's urine to drain freely from the bladder for collection. It may be used to inject liquids used for treatment or diagnosis of bladder conditions. A clinician, often a nurse, usually performs the procedure, but self-catheterization is also possible. The catheter may be a permanent one (indwelling catheter), or an intermittent catheter removed after each catheterization. A Foley catheter is retained by means of a balloon at the tip that is inflated with sterile water. They are commonly made in silicone rubber or natural rubber.

And if your timing is right, you just might find yourself some reasonably priced 9mm!

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