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Ernie's House of Whoopass! August 5, 2013
August 5, 2013

This Is Why Your Mom Tells You Not To Run With Scissors.

So listen mom, I don't are how big your tits are, having an AC adapter in your shower is fucking insane.

Hofstra University is a private, nonsectarian institution of higher learning located in the Village of Hempstead, New York, United States, about 25 miles east of New York City. It originated in 1935 as an extension of New York University called "Nassau College – Hofstra Memorial of New York University at Hempstead, Long Island"; in 1937, the institution separated from NYU and gained independence as Hofstra College, and in 1963, Hofstra College gained university status. Comprising ten schools, including a School of Medicine and a School of Law, Hofstra University is noted for a series of prominent Presidential conferences, as well as being selected to host a United States Presidential Debate in 2008 and 2012.

Last month Newsweek gave 1,000 Americans the U.S. citizenship test to see if they could pass it if they had to. Surprise, motherfuckers! About 38% failed. Here's a full sample test I've linked before and well, than others.

Billy Bajema is an American football tight end for the Baltimore Ravens of the National Football League. He was drafted by the San Francisco 49ers in the seventh round of the 2005 NFL Draft. He played college football at Oklahoma State. Bajema was drafted by San Francisco 49ers in seventh round (249th pick overall) in 2005 NFL Draft. On June 8, 2005, he signed a 3 year $1.043 million contract with the 49ers. Bajema made it to the final roster after the preseason and by the end of the 2007 NFL season, he has played in 45 games with 15 starts. Bajema signed with the Baltimore Ravens on August 1, 2012. He helped the Ravens win Super Bowl XLVII over his old team, the 49ers to earn his first championship ring. His jersey number is 86.

In related news, holy shit, Italy got hit by a fucking tornado. The next thing you know, you'll be telling me you don't believe in global warming.

Tullamore Dew is a brand of blended Irish whiskey produced by William Grant & Sons, one of the world biggest suppliers of whiskey including brands like Glenfiddich, Balvenie, Grant's and Monkey Shoulder. Although it was originally a pot still whiskey, first distilled in 1829 in Tullamore, County Offaly, the modern product is a blended whiskey that is not produced in Tullamore town. The primary blend ingredients are from the New Midleton Distillery in county Cork, as are Jameson, Powers, Paddy and the rest of the Irish Distillers products. The name derives from the initials of an early manager of the concern, Mr. Daniel E. Williams -- abbreviated "D. E. W." and merged to form "Dew". Formerly owned and marketed by the Irish company, the Tullamore Dew brand was sold to the Scottish Company William Grant & Sons in 2010.

The latest Grand Theft Auto game will take full advantage of its mature rating. That's right: GTA V to include nudity.

Here's a lesson we can all learn from our friends in Virginia: gun sales up, crime rate down. It's not black magic people, it's common sense. Brand new, name-brand AR-15's for less than $700 are back in stock.

So anyway, this chick has a book about Hitler.


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