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Ernie's House of Whoopass! December 18, 2013
December 18, 2013

Looks Like Your Computer Has Got the AIDS This Year?

Body painting with clay and other natural pigments existed in most, if not all, tribalist cultures. Often worn during ceremonies, it still survives in this ancient form among the indigenous people of Australia, New Zealand, the Pacific islands and parts of Africa. There has been a revival of body painting in Western society since the 1960s, in part prompted by the liberalization of social mores regarding nudity and often comes in sensationalist or exhibitionist forms. Modern water-based face and body paints are made according to stringent guidelines, meaning these are non-toxic, usually non-allergenic, and can easily be washed away. Temporary staining may develop after use, but it will fade after normal washing.

Kevin David Mitnick is an American computer security consultant, author and hacker. In the late 20th century, he was convicted of various computer and communications-related crimes. At the time of his arrest, he was the most-wanted computer criminal in the United States. He now runs a security firm named Mitnick Security Consulting -- and has one of the coolest business cards you will ever see -- that helps test a company's security strengths and weaknesses, and is the Chief Hacking Officer of security awareness training company KnowBe4. And given what he accomplished with a fucking rotary phone, I'd love to know what Mitnick would be able to accomplish with a smartphone.

Brach's Confections was founded in 1904 by Emil J. Brach, a son of German immigrants who had recently invested in a candy factory which had failed. He decided that he could do a better job of it himself, opening a candy store and factory in Chicago. This factory was famously filmed as Gotham Hospital in the 2008 film The Dark Knight and destroyed by a bomb set off by the Joker, played by Heath Ledger. The older red brick building in the background was the original factory. Brach's Confections is also credited with inventing several marketing techniques, such as barrel displays, glass candy counters, and the adaptation of old general store-type bulk purchasing to modern supermarkets with "pick-a-mix", a self-serve set of open candy containers which allow customers to scoop candy into bags to be sold by the pound.

Hey man, no hidden agenda here, just a newfound respect for the value of life.

How do I email something (pic w/ location) to Ernie? Jeffrey

Ernie, I've encountered this three times on your site recently and today decided to send this in case it is helpful. I use Norton Internet Security—not on of your favorites I know—but when I clicked on this link tonight I got this message: "Malicious Web Site Blocked! You attempted to access: This is a known malicious web site. It is recommended that you do NOT visit this site. The detailed report explains the security risks on this site. For your protection, this web site has been blocked. Visit Symantec to learn more about phishing and internet security." I never did see exactly what the 6 computer threats were, but the web site was trying to do something that NIS didn't like. I'm a faithful follower and LBEH donator -- $2,000 this year. Keep up the good work! Thanks, Bob

Well, for starters, you are correct. Norton is dogshit. Every experience I've ever had with their product -- and I do try them every few years or so -- always ends the same way. I install their bloated memory hogging software and the first thing I notice is how much slower my PC runs. Then I get a metric shit ton of (a) false alerts for no reason and (b) no alerts when other anti-viruses trigger and block something malicious. Then I uninstall and ask myself why the fuck I continue to give them a chance. My personal favorites -- both freebies, by the way -- are Avast! and AVG. I have both installed, regularly browse to the deepest, darkest bowels of the internet, and have no problems. In regards to the guy, I know the dude who runs the site, I regularly browse and link there, and I'm confident the site is currently clean. Let's take a look at: McAffee Site Advisor, then Sucuri - "Domain blacklisted by Norton Safe Web", and then your Norton Internet Suite. But perhaps the best clue comes from Google's Safebrowsing diagnostic, which confirms the site is clean but provides the additional information: "The last time Google visited this site was on 2013-12-18, and the last time suspicious content was found on this site was on 2013-09-24. This site has not hosted malicious software over the past 90 days."

So yes, the site did trigger once a few months ago -- probably a bad banner ad -- and has since been clean as a whistle. And while Google updates/scans sites automatically every 48-72 hours, notice with the Norton's you have to "Request a Review" -- my hunch is Norton's hasn't updated its database in as long. And secondly, thank you VERY MUCH for your continued support with LBEH. Now let's all follow Bob's example and embrace the holiday spirit with Tiny Tim's 1985 winter classic, Santa Claus Has Got the AIDS This Year and help me out with the final push for LBEH -- we've got about a $15k deficit to close up before the season if over -- help a brotha out! And if you've ever wondered about the integrity of EHOWA: Google - Norton - McAffee - Sucuri.

And Bob, if you stand in this exact spot just outside of Hickey Freeman in San Francisco, you'll share a very special moment with this Giants fan.

Ern – In case you haven't been keeping up with the Rocket Hub startup funding project for Gun Vault, they have exceeded their goal of $50,000. Best regards, Gary

That's Alyssa Rosales. Somewhat known on 4chan for sex with animals. Go figure, eh? Patrick

I have never, nor will I ever be a fan of Michael Cera. All of the films he is known for: Juno, Scott Pilgrim vs The World, Superbad, even Arrested Development... do almost nothing for me. But I will admit that I didn't know Scott Pilgrim was based upon a comic book. Who knew?

Every 48 hours in December Sony is offering a reduction of up to 65% will be on offer for one PlayStation 3 and one PlayStation Vita game meaning there'll be 24 discounts in total across the length of the promotion. There will also be reductions on movie rentals.

The Dodge Magnum is nameplate used by several Dodge vehicles, prominently as a large coupe marketed from 1978 to 1979 in the United States as well as a rear-wheel drive station wagon introduced in 2004 for the 2005 model year and produced until the end of the 2008 model year and assembled at Brampton Assembly Plant, near Toronto, Ontario, Canada. The Magnum is the last mid-size station wagon (140 to 160 cubic feet of combined passenger and cargo volume) sold by an American automobile manufacturer in the United States, though Chrysler marketed the Chrysler 300 Touring variant in Europe and Australia.

And thanks to some email alerts that were send out to me yesterday, I was able to get 1000 rounds of Remington .22 shipped to me for under $46. Although I am pissed that by the time my fat fingers got working, I missed out on those 1000 round boxes of Winchester. If you're jealous, I suggest you set up your own email alerts here and have them sent to your phone like I do.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Current Images? Fixed. Archived Images? Not S...


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