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Ernie's House of Whoopass! March 3, 2014
March 3, 2014

Somewhere Dick Cheney Is Snickering Into His Oatmeal.

There are two explanations that have are often cited as the reason people started putting limes in their beer. First, Mexican beer bottle caps would get rusty and the lime would wipe it away or clean the lip of the bottle. Second, Rimming the lip of the bottle with a lime would keep flies away. Both of these explanations are false. Beer has three major enemies – Light, Air and Time. We are interested in light. Sunlight breaks down beer. To combat this, you may have noticed that the majority of beers come in brown or green bottles. This prevents the sunlight from getting to the beer and skunking it. Unfortunately, colored glass is more expensive than clear glass; and guess what color the bottles are for the beers you put limes in? Yup. Clear. So sunlight skunks the beer. According to Corona, the reason for the lime is that, "Corona is bottled in clear glass, and before our modern methods of refrigeration and transportation, the opportunity for spoilage from exposure to sunlight was increased. Therefore, the lime technique began as a measure to mask the skunky aromas caused by spoilage."

Suave Motherfucker #1: Jeff Goldblum in Jurassic Park, especially in his lesson on Chaos Theory. I only mention it because if you remember the famed UNIX hacking scene, you can relive it with the benefit of suspenseful music

Dora the Explorer is an American educational animated TV series created by Chris Gifford, Valerie Walsh, and Eric Weiner. Dora the Explorer became a regular series in 2000. The show is carried on the Nickelodeon cable television network, including the associated Nick Jr. channel. It aired on CBS until September 2006. A Spanish-dubbed version first aired as part of a Nick en español block on NBC Universal-owned Telemundo through September 2006; since April 2008, this version of the program has been carried on Univision as part of the Planeta U block. Dora the Explorer is one of the longest-running shows of Nick Jr.

Suave Motherfucker #2: Pierse Brosnan in The Thomas Crown Affair, especially in the glider scene. I only mention it because it would have been a great place for an insane selfie.

Thomas & Friends is a British children's television series, which had its first broadcast on the ITV network on 4 September 1984. It is based on The Railway Series of books by the Reverend Wilbert Awdry and his son, Christopher Awdry. These books deal with the adventures of a group of anthropomorphised locomotives and road vehicles who live on the fictional Island of Sodor. The books were based on stories Wilbert told to entertain his son, Christopher, during his recovery from measles. From the first four series, many of the stories are based on events from Awdry's personal experience. Prior to 2009 a narrator was used to as the only voice in the series. Individual voice actors were given to the UK and US dubs of the Series, following the switch to CGI in 2009.

E! Thought you might find this interesting. The guy was arrested an hour ago, according to his facebook page. There is a link in the article of him speaking at the last hearing and getting escorted out by the State Police. Peace! Kurt

Suave Motherfucker #3: Jopnah Hill in Accepted, especially in his birthplace of crack scene. I only mention it because this diver does the same thing when he gets charged by a bull shark.

A consumer favorite, the Igloo Playmate Elite 16 Qt. Personal Sized Cooler is best suited to meet the needs of massive-sized lunch parties at picnics. This 16-quart cooler is specially designed to accommodate 30 cans within. You can also slide open the cooler without much effort using the top push-button. With a lid that swings on both sides and a molded-in easy-carry handle, this product turns out to be a convenient camping cooler. You dont have to worry about spillage as this Igloo Playmate cooler features a tent-shaped locking lid.

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