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Ernie's House of Whoopass! March 12, 2014
March 12, 2014

Today's Tribute To Rick Grimes: Stuff And Things, Things And Stuff.

First, a GAME CHALLANGE. It's been a while since we've had a good challenge, amirite? In Physicar, you jump in your vehicle and drive as fast as possible. Avoid dangerous obstacles and collect coins to upgrade your car. Finish all 30 levels with the best time possible to receive three stars rating. Only the best drivers can collect all achievements and compete for top positions in Wall of Fame. I was on level 14 when I paused play to make today's post.

I'm not one of those people who waxes macho poetic about guys and cars and motorcycles. If you love cars and want to spend all your spare time working on them, great. If you'd rather be golfing, great. That being said, even guys who don't care about cars probably need to drive them. Thus, there are still some things any self-respecting man should know about them; not for the sake of his masculinity, but for the sake of self-reliance. And I'm not talking changing radiator belts or rebuilding engines here, either. I'm talking about pretty basic stuff about which so many people seem to be absolutely clueless.

They say the lessons are in the journey, not the destination. What you will find in the NYC subway certainly proves the point. These people might leave you wondering whether it's Halloween or there's a cosplay convention somewhere. One thing's for sure, you'll certainly learn a thing or two about New York City's fashion.

First came Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus, a monster/disaster film by The Asylum, released in May of 2009, about the hunt for two prehistoric sea monsters causing mayhem and carnage at sea. It was directed by Ace Hannah and stars -- and I use that term loosely -- singer Deborah Gibson and actor Lorenzo Lamas. Though it was met with a negative reaction from critics for its outlandish plot, it is arguably the most popular film by The Asylum to date. Their follow up feature, Sharknado is a 2013 made-for-television disaster horror B movie about a waterspout that lifts sharks out of the ocean and deposits them in Los Angeles. It first aired on the Syfy channel on July 11, 2013, and "stars" Ian Ziering and Tara Reid. And now? It's Airplane vs Volcano where a commercial airliner is trapped within a ring of erupting volcanoes, the passengers and crew must find a way to survive - without landing. Sue to be released this year, "stars" Dean Cain and Robin Givens and yeah, its totally real.

If you want a chic and polished look, nothing beats a classic French manicure. This style of manicure is easy to do yourself at home. Choose a pale pink or clear base coat and make your tips pop with a crescent of white nail polish. So my question is, are these still considered French tips?

Is anyone even remotely surprised by Sbarro filing for bankruptcy? Who the fuck wants to pay $10 for a slice of shitty pizza, when you can buy an entire shitty pizza fpr $5 at Little Caesars? I think the last time I set foot in a Sbarro was at a rest stop on the New York State Thruway back when I was in the Air Force. And that was only because the Burger King was closed. And this on the heels of the company previously filing for protection from creditors back in April 2011? Look I don't think anyoen is shedding a tear of this, least of any self-respecting Italian American. So Sbarro, you will NOT be missed.

I've previously gone to great lengths railing about the differences between an accidental shooting, and a negligent shooting. The vast majority of unintentional shootings you see in the news are the result of nagligence, not an accident. So here's one I'm kind of torn on. A police officer -- the Chief of Police, as a matter of fact -- pulls his Glock 23 to compare it to a new, smaller Glock 42. He then attempts to reholster his G23 but while doing so, a string from his jacket gets tangled around the trigger, so when he tugs his jacket back down the holstered gun discharges into his leg. I'm not quite sure how to rule on this one, and I guess I'll probably call it a 50/50 split. Side note: .380 ACP is making a comeback thanks to the Glock 42.

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