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Ernie's House of Whoopass! April 4, 2014
April 4, 2014

Crouch Down And Lick The Hands Which Feed You.

"Forty years ago, when the resolution of enslaving America was formed in Great Britain, the British parliament was advised by an artful man, who was governor of Pennsylvania, to disarm the people. That it was the best and most effectual way to enslave them. But that they should not do it openly; but to weaken them and let them sink gradually, by totally difusing and neglecting the militia. This was a most iniquitous project. Why should we not provide against the danger of having our militia, our real and natural strength, destroyed? And I ask Sir, what is the militia? It is the whole people except for a few public officials." - George Mason, June 14, 1988.

Back in 2006, legendary Italian design house Pininfarina stunned the world when it revealed the P4/5 supercar. In coachbuilding tradition, a body was designed to fit an existing chassis for the P4/5, in this case one from a Ferrari Enzo, with the end result bearing little resemblance to its donor. Could the Ferrari 458 Italia-based Project F from Dutch design firm Ugur Sahin Design be the next great coachbuilt Ferrari?

Beautiful, captivating, intelligent, and majestic, Blue and Gold Macaws have held a place as one of the most popular large parrots for years. These brightly colored beauties have so much more to offer than just a pretty face -- they are full of personality as well! Their sociability and even temperaments make them great pets, and their intelligence, willingness to learn, and talking ability only help make them more precious in the eyes bird lovers. The Blue and Gold, like most parrots, thrives on attention from it's owner and will form a strong bond with its family members.

Fuck it, this guy IS a role model: Sir Charles believes the more successful you are, the better you should tip. In fact, some blackjack dealer out there has 25,000 reasons to love the guy. But Scottie Pippen, The Rock, and Tiger Woods? Not so much.

And really? Four days on, and noone out there can tell me what this tattoo reads? I say "Fuck you," Jobu, I do it myself; on this next one I'm so fucking close in Street View that I can nearly fucking taste it. I've even managed to find a photo of the alley she is walking out from. But for the fucking life of me, I can't find exactly where it is on Google Maps.

Craig Harrison was a Corporal of Horse in the Blues and Royals RHG/D of the British Army, and holds the record for the longest confirmed sniper kill in combat, at a range of 2,475 meters (8,120 feet). Harrison consecutively struck two Taliban machine gunners south of Musa Qala in Helmand Province in Afghanistan at a range of 2,475 m (2,707 yd) using a L115A3 Long Range Rifle. In a BBC interview, Harrison reported it took about nine shots for him and his spotter to initially range the target successfully. Then, he reported, his first shot "on target" was a killing shot followed consecutively by a kill shot on a second machine gunner then a third which disabled the machine gun. He later had to go into hiding when the British Ministry of Defense blew his cover, putting his life and those of his wife and daughter in great jeopardy.

These 30 GIFs capture the very essence of 2014 March Madness, with repetive goodness from the Louisville Cardinal cheerleaders.

Safeway is the second largest supermarket chain in North America after The Kroger Company, and as of January 2014, has 1,335 stores located throughout the western and central United States and northwestern Mexico. The company is headquartered in Pleasanton, California. Supermarket News ranked Safeway No. 4 in the 2011 "Top 75 North American Food Retailers" based on 2010 fiscal year estimated sales of $41 billion, and based on 2009 revenue, Safeway is the 11th largest retailer in the United States. In early 2014, Safeway agreed to be bought by an investor group led by Cerberus Capital Management, owner of competitor store Albertsons. With the new combined companies, Cerberus will be the parent company.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite So My Dad Is Visiting Fo...

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

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