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Ernie's House of Whoopass! May 20, 2014
May 20, 2014

Smart Gun, Dumb Idea.

Smart guns soon could be the only kind sold legally in New Jersey under a state law that has languished on the books for over a decade. The law, which requires the state's gun dealers to exclusively sell smart guns within three years after the first one hits the market, has been largely forgotten since the Legislature adopted it in 2002. Earlier in 2014, German company Armatix releases the P1 smart gun, which uses radio frequency technology in its .22-caliber digital pistol, which unlocks with a digital watch and a PIN. If someone who isn't wearing the watch grabs the gun, it immediately deactivates. And now The Brady Campaign is suing the NJ Attorney General to force him to start enforcing the state's smart gun law.

Personally, I'm behind the Brady Campaign on this one. Why? Because it's fucking New Jersey. The shithole of shitholes. If we can't wall the fucker up, fill it with water and drown em ahh? Then force em all to use smart guns, it'll accomplish the same thing, it'll just take longer. Personally I can't wait for this law to go into effect for the Garden state. I look forward do the first of many new articles detailing how some single mother and her daughters were gang raped and butchered, their meth fueled attackers shrugging off the .22 rounds as if they were mosquito bites. I can't wait to hear about the husband stabbed to death, his smart gun knocked out of his hands and sliding across the floor to the feet of his wife who watched in horror as the home invader slid a butcher knife into his belly while she watched in horror and pulled endlessly on the unresponsive trigger. I can't fucking wait to hear about the entire family left to burn in an arson fueled inferno, after an ex husband swung a crowbar and smashed the RFID bracelet on his ex wife's wrist, rendering her smart gun a paperweight. And boy howdy, I just sit here tingling with anticipation when some teary eyed bastard tries to explain how he wanted to defend his daughter from the guy pulling her out of the window, but all he kept seeing on his RFID watch was "WARNING BATTERY" every time he tried to fire. And I hope you'll be as enthused as I am when you hear about the single girl who was brutally raped and murdered as she was getting out of the shower, because while her smart gun was indeed in her nightstand right where she left it, her attacker saw the RFID bracelet sitting on the bathroom sink and already smashed it.

Look, I can sit here and rattle off a laundry list of reasons never to depend upon .22lr for self-defense, and then a second laundry list of reasons never to depend upon a smart gun for self-defense. So the very worst fucking thing you could ever want to defend yourself with, is a .22 caliber smart gun, especially one that costs $10,000. Keep in mind that a top of the line large caliber handgun runs no more than $1,000, and a regular ol dumb .22 handgun runs around $350. And again, the cost of the Armatix P1? $10,000. So if you live in New jersey, have fun defending your family and paying your bills. So if smart guns are such an awesome idea, fine, have law enforcement use them first. Limit all the cops in New Jersey to smart guns for 5 years, and then let me know how it works out. If you still think it's a good idea, fine, then I'll do exactly what this kid does.

My Ukrainian isn't as good as other languages, but: "???????" = to subtract, to take away, to be paralysed. "?????" = breath, waft, puff, blowing … So my best guess would be “take my breath away” or “breathtaking” or something similar. Keith

Ernie, The picture of the dude with the badge and Folsom sticker, it's from the Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco. It's a huge leather / Dom party in the streets and if you look at some of the photos it's, dare I say, shocking. Good work as usual man, stay hard! Chuck in Texas

Jesus Christ, what a dumb shit. I can't believe I didn't recognize the Folsom Street Fair especially sinec I've already mentioned it when I referenced this street banner, this locksmith on Folsom street, and the corner of Folsom and Dore.

Good news: You get free tickets to a Clippers game. Great news: You end up sitting next to Rihanna. Bad news: She breaks your new iPhone. Good news: She signs it for you. Great news: you sell it for $66,500 on eBay.

Pfanner is an Austrian juice brand. Max Hermann Pfanner started a brewery in 1854, it wasn't until 1933 when his grandson Hermann Pfanner started making juice from fresh fruits. Pfanner started as a family owned business and is still run by the Pfanner family. It is more than 25 different juice and ice tea flavors. Examples are orange, peach, apple, pineapple or blood orange.

Do you get annoyed as fuck when you're trying to watch your favorite TV show, and someone who hasn't seen it before bombards you with stupid ass questions? No problem, I got this!

Okay, new photo challenge. You have to identify the location of this IKEA store. At first I thought it was in Holland somewhere, since that photo is includes in a collection titled, Girls from Holland but after seeing the girl in question at a few other places, I'm not so sure?

Old and busted: low pass by Russian SU-24 fighter jets popping flares. The new hotness: low pass by American B-1 bomber on full afterburner. HOW YA LIKE ME NOW?

And no, you are not having an aneurysm. I am fucking with document types and font sizes and the like.

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