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Well, it Looks Like The White House Found Their New Press Secretary.

Old and busted: Burning a baby with a flash-bang grenade. The new hotness: Charging the target of the warrant -- who wasn't even there -- for the injuries.

Looks Like Oberyn Should Have Kept His EYE OUT For A Last Minute Trick, AMIRITE?

Okay it's been two days so just in case you haven't seen the fight between Lord Tyrion's champion, The Red Viper and The Mountain -- less talk, more stabbey -- but you better hurry, it won't be up long before HBO gets that ganked. And don't tell me you're the guy who's never seen Game of Thrones either, because that will be pretty hard to take.

And I Can Assure You I Work Too Damned Hard At It.

Holy shit, this guy in the black hat has a keg buried in the sand at the beach. Brilliant!

I Have Full Confidence In Your Courage, Devotion To Duty And Skill In Battle. We Will Accept Nothing Less Than Full Victory!

The Normandy landings, codenamed Operation Neptune, were the landing operations on 6 June, 1944, of the Allied invasion of Normandy in Operation Overlord during World War II. The largest seaborne invasion in history, the operation began the invasion of German-occupied western Europe, led to the restoration of the French Republic, and contributed to an Allied victory in the war. The target 50-mile stretch of the Normandy coast was divided into five sectors: Utah, Omaha, Gold, Juno and Sword Beach.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

Insert Your Favorite Title Here.

“They always talked about murdering cops,” neighbor Krista Koch told ABC affiliate KTNV-TV. "They were going to kill as many officers as they can, and then they were going to do away with themselves." -- Oh I dunno, maybe I'm just a crazy guy trying to think outside the box here, but perhaps maybe sorta you should have FUCKING SAID SOMETHING?

I Think We Consider Too Much The Good Luck Of The Early Bird And Not Enough The Bad Luck Of The Early Worm. - Franklin D. Roosevelt

Las Vegas citizen Joseph Wilcox was in the checkout line at his local Walmart on Sunday, when some crazy asshole named Jerad Miller entered the store and fired a single shot into the ceiling before demanding everyone else leave. Wilcox, legally carrying a concealed handgun and fearing the worst of Wilcox's intentions, was presented with a unique opportunity that almost no other CCW carrier had been presented with up until that point. He was in the perfect place to stop what could be another mass shooting -- which despite public perception, are happening with less and less frequency -- and save an untold number of lives. And according to all accounts, he did everything that he was supposed to do in such a situation: circle around behind the perpetrator, glance left and right for any potential accomplices, unholster his weapon but keep it at the low ready, wait for innocent bystanders to clear his line of fire before bringing his weapon to bear on his target. But Miller's wife, Amanda, who was nearby pushing a shopping cart after she and Jerad had ambushed two police officers in a nearby pizza place, shot Wilcox dead before he could act.

You Know What Hugo? You'e Made Me Proud, Too.

The story behind the viral Harley Davidson storage letter, with Dennis Packee.

Boobies Over Demons? Hell, That's An Easy Choice. You Know, Unless You Have A BFG-9000.

Old and busted: Kyrie Irving as Uncle Drew. And let's not forget chapter 2 with Kevin Love as Wes followed up soon after by chapter 3 with Nate Robertson as Lights and Maya Moore as Betty Lou -- huge LOL there in that last one at 3:10. Anyway, the new hotness: Sean Garnier as Some Old Man.

Sure, But Then What Am I Going To Do With The Other 57 Minutes?

Old and busted: The Oakland A's Yoenis Cespedes. The new hotness: The Red Sox's Jackie Bradley Jr.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

Tits And Wine? Now There's A God I Could Get Behind.

In Milwaukee, Wisconsin, the B.J. Johnson Company was making a soap entirely of palm oil and olive oil, the formula of which was developed by B.J. Johnson in 1898. The soap was popular enough to rename their company after it - "Palmolive". Around the start of the 20th century Palmolive, which contained both palm and olive oils, was the world's best-selling soap. Extensive advertising included the radio programs The Palmolive Hour and Palmolive Beauty Box Theater. A Missouri-based soap manufacturer known as Peet Brothers merged with Palmolive to become Palmolive-Peet. In 1928, Palmolive-Peet bought the Colgate Company to create the Colgate-Palmolive-Peet Company. In 1953 "Peet" was dropped from the title, leaving only "Colgate-Palmolive Company", the current name.

Every Day I Get Closer And Closer To Volunteering For Mars One.

Private Pluto is a cartoon made by The Walt Disney Company in 1943. This short showcases Pluto as a soldier. Pluto is a guard dog on a military base. He's told there are saboteurs, and is assigned to guard a pill-box. First, Pluto tries to follow marching orders, contorting himself into quite a mess. Then, he engages in hijinks with two chipmunks who are using a cannon to store and crack their nuts, and a war of wits naturally ensues. These two chipmunks would later be known as Chip & Dale, and would be their first appearance in Disney history.

Castles Was Never Quite Television Quality, But Still A Shit Ton Of Fun To Play.

Here's an Australian girl absolutely losing her shit beta testing a virtual reality zombie game. And here's what (less enthusiastic) players are seeing on their end. One of the first computer games I can remember playing is Adventure on the Atari 2600. It wasn't even my Atari, it was my cousin Billy's. But from the minute I grabbed the joystick and thumbed down that big orange button in the top left corner, I was fucking hooked. And for the next few years the grease from many a Hot Pocket soaked into the rubber boot of that joystick as the dancing pixels mesmerized me at every turn. Adventure, River Raid, Missile Command, Pitfall, Megalomania, I played them all. Well, except for E.T. -- that one sucked. Anyway, the next platform to blow wind up my skirt was of course my COmmodore 64 and I distinctly remember sitting in my bedroom -- blue weave carpet, if you must know -- and marveling over the cut screen of GI Joe (specifically 0:57 to 1:03). I remember thinking, "It's like watching a TV." I know, archaic by today's standards but when you consider the standard for computer graphics at the time had barely advanced beyond this, it was a pretty big deal. Then came PC games, which were good but not great; I remember a few that had great cut screens but the gameplay sucked ass. Very unremarkable. The next game that made me think I was watching live television was the Gran Turismo 3 intro on my Playstation 2, followed by the Halo 3 intro on my X-box 360. And now, that's been eclipsed by... the Nissan Concept 2020 Vision Gran Turismo for Playstation 4. And if you care, here's M.U.L.E.

Yeah We've All Gone Through It, Man. It's Like The Ghosts Of Christmas Past In There.

Okay according to Wikipedia, there are five Saint Josenph's Colleges in the United States; Indiana, Maine, California, Maryland and New York. A lot of times you can use simple logic to figure these things out, so which of those five hosts the Saint Joseph's Invitational? I was hoping the RP on the wall might yield a clue, but it doesn't seem to help. I even tried video game logic, still no dice.

Lance Corporal William Carpenter, United States Marine Corps.

For conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at the risk of his life above and beyond the call of duty while serving as an automatic rifleman with Company F, 2nd Battalion, 9th Marines, Regimental Combat Team One, 1st Marine Division (Forward), 1st Marine Expeditionary Force (Forward), in Helmand Province, Afghanistan in support of Operation Enduring Freedom on 21 November, 2010. Lance Corporal Carpenter was a member of a platoon-sized coalition force comprised of two reinforced Marine rifle squads, partnered with an Afghan National Army squad. The platoon had established Patrol Base Dakota two days earlier in a small village in the Marja District in order to disrupt enemy activity and provide security for the local Afghan population. Lance Corporal Carpenter and a fellow Marine were manning a rooftop security position on the perimeter of Patrol Base Dakota when the enemy initiated a daylight attack with hand grenades, one of which landed inside their sandbagged position. Without hesitation and with complete disregard for his own safety, Lance Corporal Carpenter moved towards the grenade in an attempt to shield his fellow Marine from the deadly blast. When the grenade detonated, his body absorbed the brunt of the blast, severely wounding him but saving the life of his fellow Marine. By his undaunted courage, bold fighting spirit, and unwavering devotion to duty in the face of almost certain death, Lance Corporal Carpenter reflected great credit upon himself and upheld the highest traditions of the Marine Corps and the United States Naval Service.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

Fifteen Minutes of Fame. Or Twelve Years, Either Way.

So Ike recently got a little claim to fame. Last week I spent a few hours meandering around social media and looking at a lot of dog rescue stories. Some of which ended up with happy endings, while others not so much. That of course got me to thinking about Ike, and the experience I had adopting him twelve years ago; the long drive down there from Massachusetts, meeting Inge the (German?) woman who ran the shelter, Ike almost killing me before finally getting him called down, and finally the ride home. The latter of part of which was almost like riding inside of a snow globe, because he had massive dandruff caused by a skin infection. Anyway, on a whom I decided to reach out and see if ol Inge was still there, and if she remembered Ike, and if so, just to let her know we made out okay. She was, she did and she was delighted how things turned out for Ike and me. She even put the little monster on their front page.

Rubber Duckie, You're The One. You Make Bathtime Lots Of Fun.

Muhammad Ali was once quoted as saying, "Champions aren't made in gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them-a desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have the skill, and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill." If you're like me and are inspired by that quote, you can buy it as a poster, as seen here.

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Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

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