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Ernie's House of Whoopass! June 18, 2014
June 18, 2014

Castles Was Never Quite Television Quality, But Still A Shit Ton Of Fun To Play.

Here's an Australian girl absolutely losing her shit beta testing a virtual reality zombie game. And here's what (less enthusiastic) players are seeing on their end. One of the first computer games I can remember playing is Adventure on the Atari 2600. It wasn't even my Atari, it was my cousin Billy's. But from the minute I grabbed the joystick and thumbed down that big orange button in the top left corner, I was fucking hooked. And for the next few years the grease from many a Hot Pocket soaked into the rubber boot of that joystick as the dancing pixels mesmerized me at every turn. Adventure, River Raid, Missile Command, Pitfall, Megalomania, I played them all. Well, except for E.T. -- that one sucked. Anyway, the next platform to blow wind up my skirt was of course my COmmodore 64 and I distinctly remember sitting in my bedroom -- blue weave carpet, if you must know -- and marveling over the cut screen of GI Joe (specifically 0:57 to 1:03). I remember thinking, "It's like watching a TV." I know, archaic by today's standards but when you consider the standard for computer graphics at the time had barely advanced beyond this, it was a pretty big deal. Then came PC games, which were good but not great; I remember a few that had great cut screens but the gameplay sucked ass. Very unremarkable. The next game that made me think I was watching live television was the Gran Turismo 3 intro on my Playstation 2, followed by the Halo 3 intro on my X-box 360. And now, that's been eclipsed by... the Nissan Concept 2020 Vision Gran Turismo for Playstation 4. And if you care, here's M.U.L.E.

Huh, you don't see this very often: a girl with an empty closet.

Caves are either beautiful or ugly. The beautiful ones are those with impressive stalactites and stalagmites. The ugly ones are full of bats and batshit. So, what exactly is the big fuss about this cave? Think $3 mojitos.

The Boise State Broncos are the official athletic program of Boise State University. The Broncos compete in a wide variety of sports as members of the Division I Football Bowl Subdivision Mountain West Conference. The Broncos have a successful athletic program overall, winning the WAC commissioner's cup for the 2005-06 year and 2009-10 year. Other notable sports teams include the Wrestling team, which competes in the Pacific-12 Conference, the women's basketball team, which won the WAC for the first time ever in 2007 and the tennis teams which have consistently had nationally ranked players, and men's and women's golf.

You can have neon shoes on your feet, diamond studs in your ears, and cute little short shorts covering your massive quads. But everyone knows you're not a real soccer player until you have an epic hairdo. Baseball dominates facial hair, and hockey monopolizes the mullet. When it comes to all-around coiffeured excellence, however, nobody can hold a candle to football soccer. Today, with the 2014 FIFA World Cup in full swing, we're going to take you on a little tour of the greatest hair in the history of the world's favorite sporting event.

Want to know what happened in the 1 hour and 16 minute Game of Thrones season finale, but only have a moment? No problem, here's your six second recap.

A ton of refrigeration is a unit of power used in some countries to describe the heat-extraction capacity of refrigeration and air conditioning equipment. It is defined as the heat of fusion absorbed by melting one ton of pure ice at 32 °F in 24 hours. It is equivalent to the consumption of one ton of ice per day and originated during the transition from stored natural ice to mechanical refrigeration. A refrigeration ton is approximately equivalent to 12,000 BTU/h or 3.517 kW.

Old and busted: Sir Mix-A-Lot and the Seattle Symphony performing baby Got Back. The new hotness: Brian Williams performing Baby Got Back.

And I don't know who M.S. is, but they're one lucky son of a bitch.

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