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Ernie's House of Whoopass! September 10, 2014
September 10, 2014

Wind Mitigarion Inspection? More Like Wind Wallet Colonoscopy.

So one fucking that that's really shitty down here in Florida is the homeowners insurance market racket. Since insurers only want to take your money but never pay it out, they never want to assume anything even close to a risk. For the last nine years, casa'del'Ernie has been insured through Liberty Mutual to the tune of $1,900 per year. And just this week I get a notice they're non-renewing my policy. Keep in mind no claims against the policy and we haven't had a hurricane since 2005, this is just a fuck you we're not insuring Florida anymore. Many of the big nationwide companies such as Allstate, State Farm, USAA, Nationwide, have all done the same. They're about as fucking honest in their, "Oh We're Here For You," bullshit advertising as McDonalds is with their fucking burgers. So with a new insurance policy comes a new wind mitigation inspection, which means some dude crawling around in your roof looking to make sure the builder used 8D nails and not 6D nails, to see how many roof straps holy the roof trusses on, check out all of your hurricane shutters, that sort of shit. In short, to renew my homeowners went from $1,900 with Liberty Mutual to $2,600 through Ed's Brand Quality Insurance. So let me assure you kids, growing up is not what it's cracked up to be. The worst fucking part? I didn't have any cash on hand to flip the kid who spend 30 minutes sweating his ass off up in my roof, so I asked him if he shoots. He does. What caliber? I shoot .40 Smith & Wesson. Who the fuck shoots that? How about 9mm? Nope, I shoot .40 Smith & Wesson. How about .22? Yeah, I've got a .22 rifle I plink with. So instead of $10-$15 in cash, I'm forced to flip the kid a brick of 500 22's, which currently retail for than the mortgage on my house. This is BULLSHIT.

Wow, it was January of 2012 when I highlighted these two girls reading lawrence Block's novel, Getting Off: A Novel of Sex & Violence. Now here we are over two and a half years later, and the guy is still being enjoyed by readers. Good for him, that's staying power.

Oh, I'm sorry, was yesterday's multi-million dollar house hanging off a cliff too much for you? How about we downsize to this 188-square-foot beauty for only $450,000 insead?

Who what the fuck are these red things hanging on chains? I'm guessing this is a European thing?

Hey Ernie, The photo of the chick in the pink top sans her panties was taken at the Signature at the MGM Grand. It should be the second building or middle building of the three. You can clearly see the pool on the left side at the Marriott Grand Chateau and the northern most tower doesn't allow you visibility to the pool. On the right of the pic, the blue lights are the valet entrance to the Hilton Grand Vacations. Keep up the great work… Growler

Ernie, I took a line from the "N" at the Cosmopolitan, and lined it up with the south-west corner of the Carriage House Hotel which brought me to The Signature at MGM Grand, Tower A. Here's some pics. But I wasn't happy with finding the hotel, I used a reference point on the street with the side of the Carriage House and I think it was one of the center balconies 4th or 5th from the top. Tim

Hey I might be looking for a new air conditioner for my bedroom, can anyone tell me who makes this model? Here's a close up of what I believe to be the manufacturer.... INTER-something?

Blockbuster Video Entertainment was an American-based provider of home movie and video game rental services, originally through video rental shops, later adding DVD-by-mail, streaming, video on demand and cinema theater. At its peak in 2004, Blockbuster had up to 60,000 employees and more than 9,000 stores. Due to competition from companies such as Netflix and Redbox, Blockbuster lost significant revenue and filed for bankruptcy on September 23, 2010. In November 2013, it was announced that the remaining 300 company-owned stores would close, though 50 franchise-owned stores could continue to remain open. The company's DVD-by-mail rental ceased operations as well. SIDE NOTE: I can identify three nearby movies: The Frisco Kid, Happy Gilmore, and Jackass Number Too, all on the left side.

Hi Ernie, I wonder if you or your readers could help? I recently became the proud owner of a Hopkins & Allen .22 double action revolver after my 93 yo father passed away in May. Nobody knew he had this, it was found tucked away in his chest of drawers. It apparently belonged to his grandfather and appears as though it may be a family heirloom, although the trigger mechanism is out of order, a good thing in Australia. I've attached a photo and it's an XL double action 7 shot, serial number I think is 2481, I'm not really interested in it's value, only in it's age and what it may have been used for, thanks, Gordon

Given all the bankruptcies and acquisitions of the company since 1916, it is highly improbable that serial number records have been maintained. I tried browsing through some of the usual gun auction sites, because sometimes people looking to sell a gun will include the serial number and date of manufacture [1 - 2 - 3] and this would at least allow you to bracket some kind of a window. This collector resource says you can get anywhere between between $200 and $400 for them, but I suspect that's in good working order. The NRA Museum has a pretty good write up on Hopkins & Allen, too. As far as what it was used for, given the small caliber I would guess varmint and pest control, and dispatching the occasional wounded warm animal.

The Kingsford Charcoal Company was formed by Henry Ford and E.G. Kingsford during the early 1920s. Ford had a large plant in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan; and was always looking for new ways to combine resources. One day as the Model T cars were coming off the assembly line, Ford noticed many wood scraps being discarded. He proposed that all wood scraps were to be sent to his chemical building to be made into charcoal. The Kingsford Company was formed when E.G. Kingsford, a relative of Ford's, brokered the site selection for Ford's new charcoal manufacturing plant. In its current form, Kingsford Charcoal is made from charred softwoods such as pine and spruce, then mixed with ground coal and other ingredients to make a charcoal briquette.

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