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Ernie's House of Whoopass! October 30, 2014

October 30, 2014

Looks Like The Wicked Witch Was Trumped By The Naughty Witch.

Ronald Clark O'Bryan was executed in the US after killing his eight-year-old son Timothy by poisoning candy with cyanide on Halloween night in 1974. The father, from Pasadena, Texas, had taken out a huge life insurance policy on his two children. He gave the poison candy to his son and daughter but also to four other children. Only Timothy ingested the candy and died. O'Bryan was executed on in March 1984.

Thomas the Tank Engine is a small fictional steam locomotive in The Railway Series books by the Reverend Wilbert Awdry and his son, Christopher. He became the most popular character in the series, and is the titular character in the accompanying television spin-off series, Thomas & Friends. Thomas is a tank engine, painted blue with red lining, and displays the running number one. All of the locomotives in The Railway Series were based on prototypical engines; Thomas has origins in the E2 Class designed by Lawson Billinton in 1913. Thomas first appeared in 1946 in the second book in the series, Thomas the Tank Engine, and was the focus of the four short stories contained within. Thomas' best friends are Percy and Toby.

When locals in Frederica, Delaware saw a body hanging from a tree during Halloween in 2005 they assumed it was a scary decoration. Sadly, they couldn't have been more wrong; it was actually the body of a 42-year-old woman. She had been left hanging from the tree for three hours before residents realized it was an actual person. Sadly, there are many Halloween horror stories were people have accidentally hung themselves trying to trick friends and relatives. During a Halloween party in 1990, 15-year-old William Anthony Odem accidentally hung himself while staging a dramatic gallows scene.

A torte is a rich, usually multilayered, cake that is filled with whipped cream, buttercreams, mousses, jams, or fruits, and ordinarily the cooled torte is glazed and garnished. The most well-known of the typical tortes include the Austrian Sachertorte and Linzertorte, the German Schwarzwälder Kirschtorte and the many-layered Hungarian Dobos torte. But other well-known European confections are also tortes, such as the French Gteau St. Honoré. An element common to many tortes is sweet icing; when the cake is layered, a thick covering of icing is placed between the layers, and there is almost always icing on the tops and sides of the torte.

Well ... not much more help than the guy who thought it was Arabic. However, that tattoo is not Arabic. It's Tengwar. Teng-wtf? Tengwar, it's basically an alphabet for Tolkien languages (like Elvish). There's a cursive-like font version (Tengwar Annatar Italic), like on the One Ring. And there's the font version used in the tattoo (Tengwar Parmaite). There are even a couple more fonts beyond therse. It may indeed be Elvish, or Black Speech, or it may be just plain old English ran through an online transcriber. Anyway, it's way too much nerd for even me to track down. Cheers! Michael

Ernie, Your tattoo challenge from the other day. It isn't Hebrew, or Arabic. It is one of Tolkien's Elvish scripts. Mark

Arabic, my ass. It's tengwar quenya. She's a Lord of the Rings dorkette. Patrick

Hello Ernie, Long time reader first time writer (as it goes). Looking at the image, and comparing it to Arabic as suggested by Toby and, though similar, it does not seem a match. However characters do seem to match those that I found on this web page. For some reason the answer jumped at me when I first saw the tatoo, breasts and the possibly pagan or wicken influenced pentagram necklace. I searched for Tolkien elvish language and got the above site. But I left it at that as I thought certainly one of your readers is more of an avid Lord of the Rings fanatic than I and would likely have it translated and sent in. I was surprised to find otherwise. It is going to take me more time and finesse to translate than I have right now in the wee hours of the morning... But I know people I can ask in normal waking hours. -Scott

Okay, I'm going to officially declare fuck-that-challkenge because there's no fucking way I can translate those symbols and then look at myself in the mirror afterwards. So on to better things, such as this VERY do-able photo challenge. My attempts to search for "greenview team 241-5468" came up empty, so can anyone nail them down?

He was my patient for fifteen years. He became an obsession with me, until I realized there was nothing inside him, neither conscious nor reason, that was even remotely human! An hour ago I stood up and fired six shots into him and he just got up and walked away. I am talking about the real possibility that HE IS STILL OUT THERE!

One of the most horrific recent events to happen on Halloween took place in Napa Valley, California, in 2004. Housemates Adriane Insogna, Leslie Ann Mazzara and Lauren Meanza had spent the evening handing out candy to trick-or-treaters. After going to bed, Lauren woke to the sounds of Adriane screaming at 2am, and ran outside in horror. But after hearing Adriane screaming again, Lauren ran back inside and discovered both her friends had been stabbed and were barely alive. She again ran out the house and called 911 but her two friends later died. The killer was Adriane's best friend's fiancé, Eric Copple, who committed the murders because he was jealous of the friendship between Adriane and his girlfriend.

So with those delightful Halloween stories in mind, whether you're walking around a grocery store parking lot in Dallas, Texas, or on the comfort of your own home in Vicksburg, Mississippi, it's never a bad idea to have a little protection on hand. And I don't mean condoms.

18 offensive halloween costumes that you should definitely stay away from this year