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Ernie's House of Whoopass! February 10, 2015
February 10, 2015

To Be Fair, That's Around $1,367 of 1978 Dollars Today.

The Cylons of the 2003 miniseries and 2004 Battlestar Galactica series are fundamentally different from the Cylons of the original 1978/1980 series. In the new version, the Cylons were created by humans as cybernetic workers and soldiers. As in the original series, the Cylons destroy almost the entire human civilization, chasing a few ship-borne survivors into deep space. Humans often derisively refer to Cylons as "toasters," due to the resemblance of the Cylon centurions from the first Human/Cylon war (the design of which is based on that of the centurions from the original series) to "walking chrome toasters", as described by Gaius Baltar in the miniseries. And perhaps my lying eyes are deceiving me, but is that a tattoo of a new Cylon Centurion? No really, is that a Cylon?

Game challenge. Short version: Capture the noggins in rectangles of the same color, and your score depends on your speed and accuracy. Long version: As each Noggin Man appears, move the mouse to make a box of the same size and color as his head for points. The colors must match, but with size you want to get as accurate as you can for more points. When 4 stars appear, collect them all for Star power, which amplifies your score (and also the trippy factor). If you click the wrong color, or the timer runs out, then you'll miss. Three misses and your game of Noggins is over. Beat me.

Schick Hydro Moisturizing Shave Gel prepares your skin with a fast-acting moisturizing formula that's made with vitamins E and pro-B5. It's specially formulated to help prepare your skin for a smooth shave. Plus, hydrating moisturizers ensure that the skin is taken care of afterward.

Hey Ernie, that nasty skank is drinking a bottle of Lobkowicz Fuerst, beer brewed in Czech Republic. Tim

Ernie... you see this???? Afghanistan War Hero Stripped of Silver Star. Mike

"Congressman Duncan Hunter wrote last year to John McHugh, the secretary of the Army, asking about the status of Golsteyn's seemingly endless career freeze. Apparently the secretary did not take kindly to the inquiry, as he responded in a letter last November that not only would he not be upgrading Golsteyn's Silver Star to a Distinguished Service Cross, but would be revoking Golsteyn's Silver Star entirely, a fact that Hunter revealed publicly in an article for the Daily Beast published on Tuesday." I can sum up everything you need to know about the Secretary of the Army, John McHugh, in two sentences. First, McHugh was a member of the U.S. House of Representatives from New York's 24th district. And second, McHugh never served in any branch of the military. The only bigger asshole than the Secratary of the Army who has never served in the Army, is the asshole who would nominate him.

Attention gamers, perhaps you will be able to identify the game sitting in front of the television?

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite So My Dad Is Visiting Fo...

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Yeah I Gotchu Fam Weeken...

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