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Ernie's House of Whoopass! June 9, 2015
June 9, 2015

Does Anyone Else get Road rage At Walmart, or Is it Just Me?

Earlier this year, The Boss Lady broke her ankle was was reduced to using those mobility carts whenever we went into a store. We never had a problem finding one available at Target or Publix (the local grocery) or Costco. But every time we were forced into Wally world, there was a 90% chance all of the carts were already in use and she'd have to crutch it. Invariably the carts were always occupied by some morbidly obese 40-something slob with their ass fat hanging over the sides of the cart, picking their way through the cookie aisle. Normally I can shake off the ills of society pretty easily and just chalk it up to Walmart being Walmart, but this turned out to be one of those things that reallllyyy pissed me off. As we'd walk past I would always comment none too quietly, "Oh that's why we couldn't find a mobility cart, she must have fallen and broken her impulse control." [insert dirty look here]

Speedcubing is the activity of solving a variety of twisty puzzles, the most famous being the Rubik's Cube, as quickly as possible. For most puzzles, solving entails performing a series of moves that alters a scrambled puzzle into a state in which every face of the puzzle is a single, solid color. Speedcubing is a popular activity among the international Rubik's Cube community, or cubers. Members come together to hold competitions, work to develop new solving methods, and seek to perfect their technique. As a part of the community, puzzle builders and modders try to invent new forms of combination puzzles. The current world record for a single solve of the 3×3×3 cube in competition is 5.25 seconds, set by Collin Burns in April 2015.

And I, for one, welcome our new robotic samurai overlords. As a trusted internet personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground copper mines. Also, that sword bro holds a number of Guinness World Records for his sword skills, including "Most martial arts sword cuts to one mat", "Fastest 1,000 martial arts sword cuts", "Most sword cuts to straw mats in three minutes", and my personal favorite, "Fastest tennis ball cut by sword" which was 708kpm/440mph.

Ernie, Damned if I've ever heard of it, but apparently that's a bottle of Macho's tequila. Keep whoopin' ass, Eric

The tequila bottle you're looking for is Machos Tequila. Only place I could find it was on a Bulgarian website. Dave

Okay, I have to remember to stop filtering out non-English results. Anyway. Without much to go on, can you tell me what building is open to the public?

Ready and waiting for use, the Smoke Machine 900W is a strong fog maker with robust housing, delivering a misty serenity to mobile DJ sets, medium-sized venues and parties alike. Ideally for both indoor and outdoor use, impressively filling rooms and great for extended use; this machine will produce voluminous mist clouds and elevate your events and parties to the next level. A great unit; well-designed and complete with wired remote so fog emissions are controlled throughout the night. Leave the Smoke Machine 900W free standing on stages to blast an audience with tranquil mist; create a mood at fashion shows; at launches and on stage for occasional shows and events; or mount onto stands using the built-on bracket.

Like Yakov Smirnoff always said, "IN SOVIEST RUSSIA, 65 YEAR OLD EX-BOXER MUGS YOU!"

The Star Chips I believe are from Poland, Star foods was purchaced by Pepsico Poland. That was most likely an old bag (THE CHIPS not the girl) Rick

What's popular today: Ruger 10/22 Collectors Edition with 10 round magazines for $169.99.

More than three-fourths of the honey sold in U.S. grocery stores isn't exactly what the bees produce, according to testing done exclusively for Food Safety News. The results show that the pollen frequently has been filtered out of products labeled “honey.” The removal of these microscopic particles from deep within a flower would make the nectar flunk the quality standards set by most of the world's food safety agencies. The Sioux Honey Association, who says it's America's largest supplier, declined repeated requests for comments on ultra-filtration, what Sue Bee does with its foreign honey and whether it's ultra-filtered when they buy it. The co-op markets retail under Sue Bee, Clover Maid, Aunt Sue, Natural Pure and many store brands.

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So Where The Fuck Did EHOWA Go?...

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