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Ernie's House of Whoopass! August 24, 2015
August 24, 2015

Stick Figures Seem To Be A Lot More Versatile These Days.

The Creeper is one of the most unique and iconic hostile mobs found in Minecraft, and can easily be recognized by its tall vertical structure, green pixelated skin, and four legs. It is possibly the most dangerous enemy in the game, as it is not affected by sunlight, which makes it a constant threat as it silently roams the map, searching for a player to explode upon. It has earned Minecraft billions in marketing, and is the most recognizable Minecraft mob and character, including Steve.

Miralus Healthcare is a company that is best known for marketing the homeopathic headache product HeadOn. The product has become well known for its simple television commercial which thrice repeats the phrase "HeadOn: Apply directly to the forehead!", without making any claims about the product's intended use or efficacy; for which there is no evidence. On September 26, 2008, ownership of the HeadOn brand and its manufacture was transferred to Sirvision of North America. Miralus healthcare still produces other products including: ActivOn, FirstOn, and PreferOn.

First there was Instagram, the app that made your 21st century smartphone with a 16 mega-pixel camera and dedicated Image Signal Processing chip take photos that look like they came from some shitty AOL 3.0 era Chinese made webcam. Now there's the VHS Camdorder app which makes every video look Rodney King beatdown era blurry. Hurray for technology!

THIS IS AN EMERGENCY: Since I'm pretty sure this model doesn't have OnStar, can you give me a location where these dual airbags deployed so that I may inform local emergency crews?

business owner turns the tables on armed robber. sniff, such a heart warming story. jon

Ernie, Greetings...yadda yadda, stick figure days.... I wanted to pass along a little safety about big bore hand gun shooting. I own a Magnum Research BFR chambered in .45/70 Gov't. In my world BFR stands for Big Fucking Revolver. At 4.5 lbs it's a handful to hang on to but will bring a smile with every shot. The traditional 405 grain load is considered adequate for any North American big game within its range limitations, including the great bears. The .45-70, when loaded with the proper bullets at appropriate velocities, has been used to hunt the African "Big-6" game. The .45/70 Gov't cartridge was developed for use in 1873 and fist saw combat with the Spanish/American War (1898). I've shot every thing from 300 grain to 500 grain rounds out of this thing against hogs, deer and a buffalo and have loved every shot. When I go to a range this beauty gets shot at least 100 times a session. I will be buried with this thing I love it so much. This past March however I started getting headaches, floaters and noticed my right eye wasn't focusing correctly. I went to the eye doc and found out I tore my retina. For the last 4.5 months the only thing I have shot is pellet guns and .22LR which sucks major balls. I just wanted your readers to know what can possibly happen shooting these big bore hand cannons. The eye has healed but I will be now forever limited on shooting this thing as much as I would like to. Attached are pics of a healthy retina and a torn retina (not my pics, I'm still waiting on my copies to arrive) as well as a pic of my BFR and my Sig C3 (everyday carry). I want to send a shout out to my friend Harold B. in the Pacific Northwest. -- Bill

I am going to assume the injury wasn't caused by any physical injury -- i.e. a grain of unburned gunpowder or shard of metal -- but by the concussive blast of the .45-70. The only way I can think of to completely avoid or alleviate that sort of risk, would be to go full retard and wear some wort of sealed mask that will protect your eyes from the outside pressure changes, such as a divers mask. I am going to assume you don't enjoy shooting it enough to go full retard at the range. I am also going to assume you do your own hand loading, since $1.15 per trigger squeeze and 100 trigger squeezes per session, I couldn't afford to feed that thing.

Electrocardiography is the process of recording the electrical activity of the heart over a period of time using electrodes placed on a patient's body. These electrodes detect the tiny electrical changes on the skin that arise from the heart muscle depolarizing during each heartbeat. In a conventional 12 lead ECG, nine electrodes are placed on the patient's limbs and three on the surface of the chest. The overall magnitude of the heart's electrical potential is then measured from the twelve different leads and is recorded over a period of time. In this way, the overall magnitude and direction of the heart's electrical depolarization is captured at each moment throughout the cardiac cycle.

Big E - I use SP Salon Perfect from Wal-Mart. Cheap and bright! Either the Orange Flame (4H06) or Yowza Yellow (508) for my night sites that have died, or just to make things more visible. Use white as a base coat and then the flavor of your choice. Personally, I use the yellow on the rear and orange on the front. That way it's easier to pick up the front site when trying to go fast. I also use a black permanent marker on the top and sides to cut down on glare. Leslie

Hi Ernie, The hat you're looking for is a Raekwon X Parker NY Yankees Hat in Diadora Purple … you can find these fitted caps on eBay but they're EXPENSIVE: Scott

Denny's is a full-service pancake house/family restaurant chain, known for always being open, serving breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert around the clock. Unlike many other restaurant chains, Denny's does not close on holidays or nights, except where required by law. Many of their restaurants are located in proximity to freeway exits, bars, and in service areas. For much of its history, Denny's offered a free meal to anyone on his/her birthday. The offer included a limited number of meal options from a special birthday menu. The promotional ritual ceased in 1993; though occasionally individual franchises will continue the tradition.

Old and busted: gun violence in schools. The new hotness: gun violence in Pokemon World Championships. Goddamn.

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

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