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So I'm Going To Go Out On A Limb Here, And Say He's A Very Angry Star Trek Fan.

Look closely, young padawan, as here is an EXCELLENT photo challenge. I find the design of this wire frames bench to be very interesting. Find it for me on Streetview, so I can get a closer look.

A Little Something From The Tasteless Tuesday Archives, Complete With Typos!

It all started my senior year, one day around thanksgiving. My computer's monitor blew out, and being a piece of shit computer anyway, I started saving for a whole new system rather than buy a new monitor. Of course, in the meantime I had to find another computer to mooch from. I found this in my ex girlfriend, Amanda, who I'd made up with and become friends with. She lives a good distance away from me, so I was really only able to mooch the car from my parents to go check e-mail on the weekends. Some background, so you'll see where this is going: I'm a good pool player, and I'd noticed that my pool game was off, and I wasn't feeling quite myself. I was tired all the time, and my grades had slumped slightly. So I'm at Amanda's house on a saturday, checking e-mail. I flop down in her roller chair in front of her computer, and I feel this pain in the top of my ass crack. Me, being the typical male, think it's nothing, but I did bounce in the chair only to find that the padding was weak in the middle, and the pole that the chair itself sits on is pushing through, and kind of kicking me in the ass as I bounce. Enough of that. "Alright," I think to myself, "I just hit that hard. No biggie." Well, it hurt a bit more as I rode home after staying for dinner with Amanda's family. And a bit more the next day. Monday it was tolerable, but I was beginning to think that I had bruised my tail bone. So Tuesday, the fun (?) begins. I'm at school, and by 3rd or 4th period, I've broken out in a raging fevor. And I do mean raging. I mean I'm sweating, and quivering from the chills, and I've gone dead pale. And to make matters worse, my old piece of shit Jeep is in the garage on jacks, having the clutch servied. Fuck. That means I have to either walk the mile to my house (normally not a big deal, but just moving around in my seat was becoming a problem). Staying for the rest of the day is out of the question, as now I'm having to lower myself carefully to my seat in class.

You Know What? That Was Kind Of Fun. Why Stop Now? Super Tim And The Mahoo.

Everyone at one time or another has one of those friends that either wants to have that "Alternative" lifestyle or does and it just doesn't always come out till you least expect it. Any way my buddy Tim, we called him Superman was always into some weird shit. Many a night we would here him banging the shit out of some girl in his room. Vocalizing as he started to come. Then the next day learn he was breaking in a new blow up doll or something twisted like that. He once made out with another member of our crew in a Marine bar on a bet, tongue and all to see if he could start a fight. Those Jar heads took it well, they bought him and his "girlfriend" a round and then kicked us all out.

Take Note, I Am Saying Blue Excavator. Not Blue Waffle.

I've spent the better part of the morning trying to find a blue excavator. A what? A blue excavator. I've found toy blue excavators, upon toy blue excavators, and even one real life blue excavator. But nothing that might give me a clue what company (or city?) paints theirs this color blue. Any ideas?

Wow, The REsurgence Of Tasteless Tuesday Has Been Met With Great Enthusiasm!

Back in about 1981 or 82, we made port in Olongapo, Phillipines. Seemed like a nice sort of place to be for a bunch of crazy sailors. We'd been there before, so it was a place to go visit one's known fun spots and have some good times with familiar faces. This time was different though, we wanted some new Pinay bargirl action. We ended up walking into Pauline's Bar, back into the dimly lit bar, which, when one looked real close, looked like it ought to be a real armpit. Just the kind of place we were looking for. We sat down at the bar and ordered a round. Well, one of the crazies I was with (Brian G. aka "Bri") was approached by a middle-aged bargirl who sure looked like she had seen better days. We were all pretty loaded, so she probably looked a bit better than she was, but... who cares?

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

Thankfully, Big Ron's Steakhouse Doesn't Have The Same Appeal It Once Did.

WAKE UP! THE EARLY BIRD GETS THE WORM, YOU SONS OF BITCHES! You can get a little bit of this, if you pay close attention to a little bit of that. And yes, .22 ammo is listed again.

Because There's No Way it Could Have Been A Nice Looking Charger.

Well, so far no one has been able to identify this blue bottle with an orange cap, so I thought perhaps seeing the same bottle in a different setting might be able to get an answer? Anyway, being a Tuesday I thought why not revisit another tasteless story?

Happy Veterans Day! And Coincidently, Happy LBEH 2015 Kickoff!

Veterans Day, formerly known as Armistice Day, was originally set as a U.S. legal holiday to honor the end of World War I, which officially took place on November 11, 1918. In legislation that was passed in 1938, November 11 was "dedicated to the cause of world peace and to be hereafter celebrated and known as 'Armistice Day.'" As such, this new legal holiday honored World War I veterans. In 1954, after having been through both World War II and the Korean War, the 83rd U.S. Congress -- at the urging of the veterans service organizations -- amended the Act of 1938 by striking out the word "Armistice" and inserting the word "Veterans." With the approval of this legislation on June 1, 1954, November 11th became a day to honor American veterans of all wars.

Hey France Is Our Bitch. Nobody Slaps Our Bitch But Us.

So Far Just A Couple Minor Tweaks Here And There.

Russell Simmons is an American business magnate. Married to Samantha Simmons of East Providence RI, Simmons has been described as the third richest figure in hip hop, having a net-worth estimate of $340 million in 2011. He cofounded the hip-hop music label Def Jam and created the clothing fashion lines Phat Farm, Argyleculture, and American Classics.

"Dead Girl Dancing" Hey I Didn't Name It, I'd Have Called it Living Dead Girl.

Ernie: Clearly Vomit is a master of the creative nonfiction genre. I've taken a few classes myself and while this doesn't have the sex angle his story did, you and your readers may enjoy it just the same. Joe

Holy Shit, Thanksgiving Is Next Thursday? It Seems That Fireworks Were Just Yesterday.

Well, it's time to go Christmas shopping for friends and family. So if I wanted to pick up a rechargeable razor like this one, what make and model and I shopping for?

Insert Your Favorite Title Here.

Reminds me of the most painfull experience in my life, about 3 yers ago, working in a factory. I worked the ovens in a casting facility. We had ceramic molds that were heated up to between 2100 and 2350 degrees (depending on the job) which I would take out of the oven, and put in a machine that another person uses to fill the molds up with melted metal. Hot shit, rough job, but good money. The ovens were about 30 feet long, you put a steel tray on one end, put the mold on top of it, then use a hydraulic pusher to push it in the oven. Then you go in front, take a mold out, pull out the tray it was sitting on, and repeat the whole process... always had 15 or so steel trays in the oven. Got burned a few of times, mostly from the hot air that got under my saftey mask and burned off my eyelashes and other hair, some worse, (got a lot of burn blisters over the course of the time I was there, but nothing scarring or anything.

Surprise, Surprise. A Bunch Of Armed Atheists Just Took Hostages In Mali.

This week's FRIDAY FLICK doesn't have much in the way of quotable dialoge, but I think it's pretty poignant. "General Woodbridge is waiting for the 'Go Ahead' from the President. I'm waiting for the 'Go Ahead' from General Woodbridge. And you are waiting for the 'Go Ahead' from me."

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

Holy Shit, Only Three Days Until Thanksgiving. And Just Starting to Get Knee Deep In LBEH.

You know the old stereotype about how Russians are infatuated with Adidas tracksuits? Well this guy isn't fucking around. And since Adidas sneakers seem to be the topic at hand, perhaps you can show me where these were located?

So, Does Anyone Have Any Nice Plans For The Upcoming World War?

Ah, Aladdin. The Disney film that broke box office records, kept the comeback of Disney animation going and featured more pop culture references than you could shake a magic lamp at. Aladdin's magic and excitement has captivated audiences around the world and it's hard to belive it has been 23 years since one of our favorite Disney classics swept us off our feet like a magic carpet and into the land of Agrabah.

Insert Your Favorite World War III Joke Here.

So just to recap the last few days events, now our NATO ally has shot down a Russian bomber killing one pilot, and then Syrian rebels -- you read as "ISIS" -- used an American made TOW missile to destroy one of the rescue helicopters, killing one of the crewmembers onboard. So now Vladimir Putin is going to go all "Yo Homie, you got my briefcase?" on Turkey, whom we are bound to defend. Uh-huh. Just a friendly reminder, the invading forces will likely be carrying Russian designed AK-74 assault rifles chambered in 5.45x39 so we should be able to pick up ammo on the move. If not, here's how to learn Russian in fifteen minutes!

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here....

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