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Ernie's House of Whoop Ass!
October 18, 2014

Insert Your Favorite Weekend Joke Here.

holy shit!! these are some of the biggest camel toes i've ever seen... these bitches can swallow their opponents!

x

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weekend boob dump: one - two - three - four - five - six - seven - eight - nine - ten-2 - eleven - twelve - thirteen



October 17, 2014

Well, Let's be Honest, People have Been Remembered For Worse Things.

Since it's Friday, see if you can beat a score of 1140 after you get some chain reactions rolling in Grid Game.

The classic Crystal Caribbean series continues in this crystal-clear pink 8 1/2 inches soft jelly vibe that warms to the body, and its incredibly soft and stimulating vibe is flexible, with added textures for extra pleasure. It also has 10 amazing functions, including escalating vibration, pulsating, surging, throbbing and more. You can easily control the Crystal Caribbean 4 with the touch of a button, so you can switch up the sensations without interruption.

So if you're good at geography, can you tell me where in the world the Caje Byliny is located? Sure, you'd think Prague, but the Street View doesn't jive.

All my life I have tried to solve the Rubik's Cube puzzle. Ever since I was a fucking kid and it first came out; from the time I played in the sand, all the way through high school, I could never complete more than two sides. And whether I played with it for ten minutes or ten hours, not a single fucking time have I been sucessful in finishing that fucking cube. So it pisses me off to no end to learn that Justin Bieber can solve a Rubik's Cube in two minutes.

Neutrogena oil free Acne Wash combines powerful cleansing with maximum strength acne medicine for clinicaly proven clear skin in just one step. It removes 93 of your skin's surface coil in 1 use and gets to the source of your breakouts even before they appear. Neutrogena oil free acne wash contains Salicylic Acid to get rid of acne you have now and help prevent future breakouts.

Old and busted: Lifeboat front flip during launch. The new hotness: Lifeboat triple lindy during recovery.

WikiArms Live Ammo Engine tracking letting you know of the best ammo deals around the web!


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October 16, 2014

I Needed My Morning Coffee Today More Than Usual.

So my morning started off with Ike poking his nose into the pantry, climbing up on some stuff and helping himself to a package of Oreos. I managed to stop him after only a couple and chased him out of the kitchen, tail between his legs. it wasn't until a few minutes later I noticed he vomited on the living room carpet. Twice. And as I was cleaning that up, he turns to face the door -- ass to me -- hunches up and shits himself. And then apparently exhausted, laid down in it. He's feelin' all right now, though. Even begged at breakfast. How's your morning going so far?

Also known as hyperopia, farsightedness occurs when your eye is too short in relation to the curvature of your cornea. In other words, if you are farsighted, your eye is shorter and flatter than it should be. Farsightedness is relatively common, affecting about one in four people. Usually, it's an inherited condition. Some people have very mild cases of farsightedness that may not even require corrective eyewear, and some patients have cases that are so severe they may need very thick glasses. If the condition is severe and left untreated, it can lead to other problems, such as amblyopia, commonly referred to as (lazy eye) or strabismus (crossed eyes). At first I was going to use a Mr. Magoo reference for that girl, but ultimately there are lots of people who look like cartoon characters.

JK Rowling has written to a teenager who found strength in the words of a Harry Potter film after her entire family were shot dead. Cassidy Stay, 15, from Texas, survived the attack by playing dead but her mother, father, two younger sisters and two younger brothers were all murdered by the gunman in the 9 July attack. In a moving speech she made at a memorial just days after the murders she quoted the fictional headmaster Albus Dumbledore from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, and telling mourners, "Happiness can be found even in the darkest times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." Of course Dumbledore was later killed by Voldemort, so take that advice with a grain of salt, I suppose.

This is the year of you. The year to go the distance. The year of anything's possible. It starts here with the Magnificent Mile Chicago Women's Half Marathon & 5K, which will be the first running event in history to include Chicago's iconic Magnificent Mile as the course centerpiece. The Magnificent Mile Chicago Women's Half Marathon is regarded as one of the premier half marathon events, with Runner's World naming it as one of the top 10 half marathons in the United States.

You were close, that model looks like the Eureka Easy Clean II Bagless Stick Upright Vacuum. Rick

Hmmm. So a second healthcare worker has been infected with Ebola, and did a little travelling before she was diagnosed? And they still don't know how she or the other nurse were infected? And the CDC is considering adding the names of all the healthcare workers who cared for Thomas Eric Duncan to the TSA no-fly list -- which for the record would be the first time why anyone would know why their name is on that list -- and yet we still haven't stopped flights from Liberia. Awesome. Maybe picking up some Ebola survival gear isn't so crazy after all? Shit it was probably six months ago when I was shitfaced one night, surfing Amazon and in a drunken haze, bought two of these Russian gas masks. Why? Because I was drunk and they were under $10 each, that's why. That was was a good enough reason for me. That deal has long since expired so now it looks like everyone else on my street is going to die, and I'll inherit the entire neighborhood. Bourbon and bacon shall be our food and drink, and I shall name it Ernieland, and I will need henchmen so speak up now. And if you live in Dallas, perhaps one of these Israeli gas masks wouldn't be a bad choice.

The free city-state of Hamburg was the first German state to establish diplomatic relations with Argentina in 1829, sending the first Germany ambassador to Argentina in May of 1871. Trade developed between Germany and Argentina as early as the German Unification. Later on, Argentina maintained a strong economic relationship with Germany and supported them with supplies during World War I. With the rise of Nazism in Germany, Nazi agents started active propaganda work among the ethnic Germans living in Argentina, with Nazi-organized meetings reportedly held as early as 1933. Argentina stayed neutral during the whole of World-War II, declaring war on Germany only just before its capitulation. To postwar Germans, Argentina was the most desirable destination for middle- and upper-class emigrants next to Switzerland.

Ernie, I can't identify this gun. Can you? It's an FN-Derivate??? Jim

Well, my initial image search brought me to several galleries like this, which didn't really give me any info. In fact, there were lots of second-hand sites hosted this gallery as well, including this Ukranian airsoft forum, but nothing on an actual source. I tried the Facebook page for SMGLee and looked through his photo albums, still no dice. At this point, I wasn't entirely sure it was a real weapon or some non-functioning stage prop. next I started searching through the Wikipedia entries for various weapons used by the US Navy Seals, and thought I hit paydirt with the FN-303, but it's not quite right. After some more snooping -- EUREKA! -- I stumbled across the Enhanced Grenade Laaunching Module for the FN-SCAR. You're welcome.

Photographer Kate Garner has released a new series of art prints featuring supermodel Kate Moss. The photographs are being released as a series of 20 unique canvas prints, utilizing such techniques as screen printing, glazing, diamond dust, painting, and more. The photo series is called “Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil, See No Evil,” and may be almost as controversial as the original photographs. There's one hitch, though: The prints use the photos of Moss taken when she was only 16.

Old and busted: Navy F-18 Hornet performing a low level flight through some canyons in Northern California. The new hotness: RAF Typhoon performing a low level flight through the some canyons in west-central Wales.


October 15, 2014

Sure, The Cheerleaders Bring You In, But It's Always The offensive Lineman Washing Your Car.

One of my favorite storylines from the third season of The Sopranos: Salvatore "Mustang Sally" Intile learns the relationship between cause and effect. Of course, Paulie Walnuts was awesome in the hospital scene that preceded the hit, but Paulie Burt Young stole the show.

Captain Tony's Saloon is a bar located at 428 Greene Street, in Key West, Florida. The bar has been patronized through the years by many well-known artists, writers and celebrities. In fact, an interesting feature of the bar is that when any celebrity visits, a barstool is added with that patron's name. You will find barstools painted with the names of famous people such as Ernest Hemingway, Truman Capote, Duane Cahill, Jimmy Buffett, Shel Silverstein, John Prine, presidents John F. Kennedy and Harry Truman, and even your mom. During Fantasy Fest, you can come on by legendary Captain Tony's Saloon and explore your fantasies in naughty or nice all-plaid attire. You get to meet new friends, and enjoy live music!

Are you ready to realize that everything you've ever known about stuff is wrong? For example earlier on Monday, the fact that Christopher Columbus never reached any area now known as the United States of America -- he mainly visited the Caribbean Islands, which are their own independent countries -- or that George Washington never had any wooden teeth. And as if that wasn't enough, just wait until you read about the Declaration of Independence and its real connection to the date 4th of July.

That is a restaurant in Cap d'Agde, France....aka the "Naked City". I cannot find the name of the restaurant, but recognized the location very quickly! Ryan

Zooming out from the Streetview to the map view, I'm pretty sure that restaurant is called "Lagon Bleu," or to people who haven't surrendered to the Germans, "Blue Lagoon." Either way, nice find, Ryan! Okay housekeepers, I'll need your help with this one. What model vacuum cleaner is sitting here? At first I thought it was a Eureka Lightweight Easy Clean Upright, because of the vents on the side, but there's no yellow cord hook on that back of that model, and there is one on hers. So I'm stumped; can you do any better?

In this dashboard camera footage of a high-speed chase in the Czech Republic, a biker tries to outmaneuver a police car, only to have the officer put on a masterclass in weaving through traffic.

CVS/Pharmacy Deep Cleansing Exfoliating Scrub is specially formulated to clean pores deep down while exfoliating skin,. Gentle micro scrubbers soften skin and remove dirt, oil and makeup without over drying. The cooling formula provides a powerful clean feeling, leaving your skin with a refreshing tingle. CVS Deep Cleansing Exfoliating Scrub is oil free, won't clog pores and rinses clean.

Bump Fire Systems Stock - $105.99 Shipped!! - Safe and precise way to Bumpfire your rifle


October 14, 2014

Just For The Record, I Named That Image "EBOLAASSHOLE.JPG"

Does anyone know why Thomas Eric Duncan, the first patient diagnosed with Ebola inside the country, died of the disease? Was it because he lied on his customs form when he entered the country? No. Was it when he casually mentioned that he might have visited Liberia in his virst hospital visit and accepting only antibiotics, before coming clean on a follow up visit and admitting he had direct contact with an Ebola patient? No. How about when even his stupid fucking family had to be sequestered under armed guard, because they wouldn't accept voluntary quarantine? No. It was because he was poor, black and had no insurance, of course! The only thing else this asshole could have done wrong was to ignore medical advice and treat himself with a vegan diet, acupuncture, and bowel cleanses.

And just so there's no misunderstanding, I do hope Ebola mutates and goes airborne, if it hasn't already. I hope it turns into a pandemic and burns like an out of control wildfire. Knock the world population down from 7 billion ot so to around 4 billion, and solve all of the world's problems in one quick stroke. Homelessness? Not with all the vacant homes left behind. Hunger? Nope, we'll have half as many mouths to feed with the same resources. Unemployment? No problem, we need help burying all these bodies. And for you Greenpeacey Save-the-Whalers? It'll reduce our carbon footprint. Now I'm not trying to create a panic and suggest you run out and start putting together your own Ebola survival kit, I'm just saying if an opposing team will get entirely wiped out, maybe the Raiders won't finish the season 0-16. SEE, EVERYONE WINS.

The Sun Java Workstation W1100z and the Sun Java Workstation W2100z are AMD Opteron processor-based systems. These were the first x86-architecture workstations Sun had produced, other than the short-lived Sun386i in the late 1980s. A maximum of 16 Gbytes of dual-channel registered ECC DDR SDRAM is available for the two-processor system; four DIMMs per processor. Supported operating systems were Solaris, Red Hat Enterprise Linux WS or SUSE Linux Enterprise Server 9. The Java Workstation name alluded to the workstations being intended to run Sun's Java Desktop System, a GNOME-based desktop environment.

The yellow bag is from a gummi candy store in Germany, Baeren Treff. Thanks for running the only site I check each morning. Gregg.

That picture would be replacement of the lower jaw (mandible). Usually due to cancer, and sometimes trauma. In this case it's probably cancer. Tobacco products in the oral cavity are a bad thing, m'kay? They have removed all bone tissue to just before the condyle and screwed a titanium analog of the mandible to what is left. Because there is no bone tissue to support the soft tissues of the mandible it just flops on his chest. Oh, and there is a suture and thread holding it down and out of the way. They will attach the soft tissues of the mandible to the analog, and if the patient is lucky, they will attach some implant teeth to the analog so he doesn't have to eat dinner from a blender for the rest of his life. No amount of surgery will ever make him look right again and he will look a lot like Roger Ebert did late in life. Speech will be problematic if at all possible. Without supporting bone tissue it will be impossible to reproduce certain speech patterns. That's probably one of my favorite pictures of oral surgery and a shining example of why people should never chew tobacco. -Todd

Cotton swabs consist of a small wad of cotton wrapped around one or both ends of a short rod, usually made of either wood, rolled paper, or plastic. They are commonly used in a variety of applications including first aid, cosmetics application, cleaning, and arts and crafts. The term "Q-tips" is often used as a genericized trademark for cotton swabs in the USA. Although doctors have said for years that usage of the cotton swab for ear cleaning or scratching is not safe, such use remains the most common.

Evidently some dude found on the Panthers sideline during Sunday's game between the Panthers and the Bengals may have been busted on national TV trying to get an upskirt creepshot of a Bengals cheerleader.

A polarizer can convert a beam of light of undefined or mixed polarization into a beam with well-defined polarization, polarized light. Brewster's angle -- also known as the polarization angle -- is an angle of incidence at which light with a particular polarization is perfectly transmitted through a transparent dielectric surface, with no reflection. When unpolarized light is incident at this angle, the light that is reflected from the surface is therefore perfectly polarized. This special angle of incidence is named after the Scottish physicist Sir David Brewster (1781–1868).

Hey Ernie, It appears the football photo was taken on November 22, 2009 based on the result found HERE. You can see the score and Alex Smith's numbers are identical. What really threw me was the question of the actual game being shown. I thought it was the Bears vs somebody, but they played the Eagles that week. It appeared to be the Chargers on offense but they played the Broncos that week. Then it dawned on me. Those were the Broncos' 2009 Throwback Uniforms. Hideous. Keep up the good work. Matt

Hey big E, I wanted to show a friend the video of the robber getting shot in the head at point blank but cannot find the kaboom head shot link. The archives have through September 24th and the home page starts at October 4th. Is there a broken link? Missing pages? Am I a moron and don't know how to navigate a web site? John

Nah, you're fine, it's my archive script that's kind of fucked up. Fixing it has been on my to-do list since, like, 2008. The BOOM HEADHOT you're looking for is on the 3 October page.

Cobalt Flux was a game controller manufacturer based in the greater Salt Lake City, Utah area of the United States. One notable product from Cobalt Flux was the polycarbonate plastic and metal-based dance platform, which is used with console dance games such as Dance Dance Revolution. Fundamentally, the Cobalt Flux dance platform is similar to most dance pad designs. Instead of the typical four arrow plus corners panel layout as is common in soft dance pads, there are nine usable foot panels: center, left, right, up, down, and corners. Cobalt Flux dance platforms are considered to be among the most reliable according to dance game enthusiasts, however there are also anecdotes of less than high reliability.


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