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Ernie's House of Whoop Ass!
October 31, 2014

Happy Halloween, Motherfuckers!

On Halloween night in 1998, Bronx resident Karl Jackson, 21, went with his girlfriend to pick up her nine-year-old son from a party. As they waited, a group of teenagers started throwing eggs at their car, and Jackson decided to get out and speak to the teens. But as he got back into the car, one of them pulled out a gun and shot him in the head. He died at the scene and the teenager prosecuted for killing Jackson, teenager Curtis Sterling, was 17 when he was arrested. Serving 20 years, inmate No. 99A4542 at a state prison in Ulster County. Every October, Mr. Sterling receives a Halloween card in the mail. The cards read: "I'm glad you're still there." They are from Karl Jackson's mother.

Do you want to see something amazing? Check out this Dutch store that actually lets you test different types of toilet paper. So yes, you can take a dump and then decide what's better for you. Or check out how the members of the infamous N.W.A. have aged, some a lot worse than others. Or Jackie Chan's story on how when he was a young actor he met Bruce Lee. All these and many other fascinating photos containing amazing facts are right here.

The Kern River is a river in the U.S. state of California, approximately 165 miles long. It drains an area of the southern Sierra Nevada mountains northeast of Bakersfield. Fed by snowmelt near Mount Whitney, the river passes through scenic canyons in the mountains and is a popular destination for whitewater rafting and kayaking. It is the only major river in the Sierra Nevada mountain range that drains in a southerly direction. Since the late 19th century the Kern River has been almost entirely diverted for irrigation, recharging aquifers and the California Aqueduct, although some water empties into Lake Webb and Lake Evans, two small lakes in a portion of the former Buena Vista Lakebed.

The best I can get is the Aria photo was taken at the strip beside Gucci ad, through Aria resort exit road! Must be a tourbus!! Jan

Hello again Ernie, Looks like the Aria picture was taken from the Panorama Towers. Jeff

To be honest, I'm almost tempted to go with Jan's theory about the tour bus, for the simple reason the headlights of the cars don't look that far down, maybe one story at the most. Using Jeff's screen grab, I was able to find the general location the photo was taken from, although it looks like that access road is covered now? But since casinos seem to be the theme this week -- and I'll preface this one by saying I ususlly try to avoid gratuitous box shots -- but this challenge was too good to pass up. Where is this escalator?

I'm not entirely sure why I look forward to sexy NFL cheerleader Halloween costumes every year. NFL cheerleaders aren't like regular women, some of whom use Halloween as en excuse to dress much more provocatively than they normally do. NFL Cheerleaders dress provocatively every week during the football season, so their Halloween costumes don't really show you much you haven't seen before.

Sixteen year old foreign exchange student Yoshihiro Hattori was shot and killed when he attempted to visit a Halloween party in 1992. Yoshihiro was with his fellow exchange student Webb Haymaker when they attempted to get into the house party in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Arriving at the house, they decided to go around the back after receiving no response. But Webb was horrified to discover that Yoshihiro was shot dead by the home's owner, Rodney Peairs, who thought the students were burglars.

Ernie- the Bao's have been getting a lot of feedback due to their price (cheap) and you get what you pay for (cheap) and these radios do require the use of a ham license ($15 and passing the test). Having said that, I was speaking with some ham electronic tech's yesterday and there's apparently some problem's with the firmware as far as maintaining settings. So you turn it on, program, tell it to keep the settings, turn it off when you're done, turn it on later... and your setting's are gone so you have to start all over again. I'd wait 6 months, let them work the soft/firmware out, and get your license during this time. Larry with the mutt

Ernie, Been a fan since the stick figure days. How good is it? Well, I have one and I've had no problems. Just remember that any radio, regardless of brand, without a repeater to bounce the signal off of, is going to lose effectiveness over 2 miles. After that you start running into diminishing returns due to the signal being blocked (trees, buildings) as well as the curvature of the earth. Rule of thumb for this is "Line of Sight". If you can see it, you might get a signal to it, which is why being higher is better for radio operation. From one May 2 baby to another, Ed

Ernie - They're ok but difficult to program. The directions are vague and hard to follow. Save your cash and purchase this instead. Bob

So pretty much it's a get-what-you-pay-for piece of Chinese shit. Gotcha. I'll keep hunting for a decent two-way radio, maybe the Icom that Bob suggested.

This is perhaps every parents worst Halloween nightmare: three teenage girls were abducted during a night of trick or treating in 2009. Aaron Thomas threatened the girls before sexually assaulting two of them. The third girl was able to use her mobile phone to call her mother, which caused Thomas to run away. He was caught two years later. On March 1, 2013, Thomas was sentenced to three life terms in prison plus an additional 80 years for his Halloween attack on these three teenaged trick-or-treaters in Prince William County, Virginia.

I got a people who sucessfully found the location of this photo, which I will share on Monday. Plus, Monday's challenge will be to stalk a porn star!



October 30, 2014

Looks Like The Wicked Witch Was Trumped By The Naughty Witch.

Ronald Clark O'Bryan was executed in the US after killing his eight-year-old son Timothy by poisoning candy with cyanide on Halloween night in 1974. The father, from Pasadena, Texas, had taken out a huge life insurance policy on his two children. He gave the poison candy to his son and daughter but also to four other children. Only Timothy ingested the candy and died. O'Bryan was executed on in March 1984.

Thomas the Tank Engine is a small fictional steam locomotive in The Railway Series books by the Reverend Wilbert Awdry and his son, Christopher. He became the most popular character in the series, and is the titular character in the accompanying television spin-off series, Thomas & Friends. Thomas is a tank engine, painted blue with red lining, and displays the running number one. All of the locomotives in The Railway Series were based on prototypical engines; Thomas has origins in the E2 Class designed by Lawson Billinton in 1913. Thomas first appeared in 1946 in the second book in the series, Thomas the Tank Engine, and was the focus of the four short stories contained within. Thomas' best friends are Percy and Toby.

When locals in Frederica, Delaware saw a body hanging from a tree during Halloween in 2005 they assumed it was a scary decoration. Sadly, they couldn't have been more wrong; it was actually the body of a 42-year-old woman. She had been left hanging from the tree for three hours before residents realized it was an actual person. Sadly, there are many Halloween horror stories were people have accidentally hung themselves trying to trick friends and relatives. During a Halloween party in 1990, 15-year-old William Anthony Odem accidentally hung himself while staging a dramatic gallows scene.

A torte is a rich, usually multilayered, cake that is filled with whipped cream, buttercreams, mousses, jams, or fruits, and ordinarily the cooled torte is glazed and garnished. The most well-known of the typical tortes include the Austrian Sachertorte and Linzertorte, the German Schwarzwälder Kirschtorte and the many-layered Hungarian Dobos torte. But other well-known European confections are also tortes, such as the French Gteau St. Honoré. An element common to many tortes is sweet icing; when the cake is layered, a thick covering of icing is placed between the layers, and there is almost always icing on the tops and sides of the torte.

Well ... not much more help than the guy who thought it was Arabic. However, that tattoo is not Arabic. It's Tengwar. Teng-wtf? Tengwar, it's basically an alphabet for Tolkien languages (like Elvish). There's a cursive-like font version (Tengwar Annatar Italic), like on the One Ring. And there's the font version used in the tattoo (Tengwar Parmaite). There are even a couple more fonts beyond therse. It may indeed be Elvish, or Black Speech, or it may be just plain old English ran through an online transcriber. Anyway, it's way too much nerd for even me to track down. Cheers! Michael

Ernie, Your tattoo challenge from the other day. It isn't Hebrew, or Arabic. It is one of Tolkien's Elvish scripts. Mark

Arabic, my ass. It's tengwar quenya. She's a Lord of the Rings dorkette. Patrick

Hello Ernie, Long time reader first time writer (as it goes). Looking at the image, and comparing it to Arabic as suggested by Toby and, though similar, it does not seem a match. However characters do seem to match those that I found on this web page. For some reason the answer jumped at me when I first saw the tatoo, breasts and the possibly pagan or wicken influenced pentagram necklace. I searched for Tolkien elvish language and got the above site. But I left it at that as I thought certainly one of your readers is more of an avid Lord of the Rings fanatic than I and would likely have it translated and sent in. I was surprised to find otherwise. It is going to take me more time and finesse to translate than I have right now in the wee hours of the morning... But I know people I can ask in normal waking hours. -Scott

Okay, I'm going to officially declare fuck-that-challkenge because there's no fucking way I can translate those symbols and then look at myself in the mirror afterwards. So on to better things, such as this VERY do-able photo challenge. My attempts to search for "greenview team 241-5468" came up empty, so can anyone nail them down?

He was my patient for fifteen years. He became an obsession with me, until I realized there was nothing inside him, neither conscious nor reason, that was even remotely human! An hour ago I stood up and fired six shots into him and he just got up and walked away. I am talking about the real possibility that HE IS STILL OUT THERE!

One of the most horrific recent events to happen on Halloween took place in Napa Valley, California, in 2004. Housemates Adriane Insogna, Leslie Ann Mazzara and Lauren Meanza had spent the evening handing out candy to trick-or-treaters. After going to bed, Lauren woke to the sounds of Adriane screaming at 2am, and ran outside in horror. But after hearing Adriane screaming again, Lauren ran back inside and discovered both her friends had been stabbed and were barely alive. She again ran out the house and called 911 but her two friends later died. The killer was Adriane's best friend's fiancé, Eric Copple, who committed the murders because he was jealous of the friendship between Adriane and his girlfriend.

So with those delightful Halloween stories in mind, whether you're walking around a grocery store parking lot in Dallas, Texas, or on the comfort of your own home in Vicksburg, Mississippi, it's never a bad idea to have a little protection on hand. And I don't mean condoms.

18 offensive halloween costumes that you should definitely stay away from this year


There are 10 million members at Adult Friend Finder, all of which looking for fun filled action to keep warm this chilly season. Even if you don't want to hook up, sign up for free and check out tons of nude photos and profiles. With 10 million members, you may find the chick next door looking to get laid. And you ladies, don't be shy. Tons of guys are waiting for you, too. Just take the one minute to find some people in the area! So sign up for free then go to your e-mail to confirm your account and get busy!

October 29, 2014

Wait, Would That be Considered Pornography Or Science? ...Science Porn?

Zumanity is a resident cabaret-style show by Cirque du Soleil at the New York-New York Hotel & Casino on the Las Vegas Strip. The production was unveiled on September 20, 2003. It is the first "adult-themed" Cirque du Soleil show, billed as "the sensual side of Cirque du Soleil" or "another side of Cirque du Soleil". Created by René Richard Cyr and Dominic Champagne, Zumanity is a departure from the standard Cirque format. Intended to be for mature adult audiences only, this show is centered on erotic song, dance, and acrobatics.

King County Metro, or Metro for short, is the public transit authority of King County, Washington, a division of the King County Department of Transportation. It began operations on January, 1973, but can trace its roots to Seattle Transit, founded in 1939, and Overlake Transit Service, founded in 1927. As of 2012, it operated 1,396 buses on 240 routes. Its annual ridership in 2012 was over 114 million making it the 8th largest agency in the nation. For almost 40 years, until September 2012, most of downtown Seattle was designated as a zero-fare zone, an area in which all rides on Metro vehicles were free, known as the Ride Free Area. Intended to encourage transit usage, improve accessibility, and encourage downtown shopping.

It's for their rarity that we appreciate genuinely scary games even more, and why we decided to showcase thirteen of the scariest moments in games we've encountered this generation. There may never be another Pyramid Head to drag his oversized sword across the floor, but thankfully there are a few games from this generation that have managed to awaken our primal fears as well as the original Silent Hill games have. Keep in mind that some of these games weren't even designed to shock and horror, but they accomplish it just as well as any game dedicated to survival horror.

You can tackle quick cleaning touch-ups and help stop the spread of germs with Lysol Disinfecting Wipes. Strong enough for even the toughest messes, Lysol disinfecting wipes can be used on most hard, non-porous surfaces. In addition to killing 99.9% of bacteria and viruses, Lysol disinfecting wipes also remove more than 95% of allergens, including pet dander, dust mites, and pollen. Available in Lemon and Lime Blossom in a yellow container, and Ocean Fresh in a green container.

Doth anyone have any experience with these BaoFeng UV-5RE dual-band radios? Are they something handy to have hanging around in an emergency? You know, typical stuff like hurricanes, power outages, zombies...

Back again for yet another year are the Controllable Halloween Decorations for Celiac Disease. You can not only view the 10,000 lights and inflatables via three webcams, but you can control them - i.e. inflate/deflate the giant Frankenstein, Pumpkins, Grim Reaper, Skull, SpongeBob SquarePants, and Homer Simpson - D'OH! The website is totally free (and totally fun) but also raises awareness and funds for charity via optional/voluntary donations - over $80,000 for the Center for Celiac Research. I've supported this world-class research organization for almost a decade and even though I found out last year that the original Celiac Diagnosis of my kids was a false positive (Email me for more details - nutshell summary is medical science is "hard" so not always 100% correct), I'm still helping them raise awareness and supporting research for an eventual cure. Speaking of kids, people ask how they are doing (great) ... although Dirk was a bit chilly after doing the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge (with a garbage can!) ... and we had a super-duper fun time doing a week long rafting trip down the Middle Fork of the Salmon River. While Wendy was off to Africa for a couple of weeks, I had my own local wildlife experience taking pictures of some really cute Cooper's Hawklets nesting in my neighborhood. So enjoy turning the Halloween display on & off ... which is just the warmup for Christmas ... HO-HO-HO! ALEK

A compact fluorescent lamp (CFL), also called compact fluorescent light, energy-saving light, and compact fluorescent tube, is a fluorescent lamp designed to replace an incandescent lamp; some types fit into light fixtures formerly used for incandescent lamps. The spiral CFL was invented in 1976 by Edward E. Hammer, an engineer with General Electric, in response to the 1973 oil crisis.[7] Although the design met its goals, it would have cost GE about $25 million to build new factories to produce the lamps, and thus the invention was shelved. The design eventually was copied by others and in 1995, helical coiled CFLs, became commercially available. Since that time, their sales have steadily increased.

I met him, fifteen years ago; I was told there was nothing left; no reason, no conscience, no understanding; and even the most rudimentary sense of life or death, of good or evil, right or wrong. I met this six-year-old child, with this blank, pale, emotionless face, and the blackest eyes... the devil's eyes. I spent eight years trying to reach Michael Myers, and then another seven trying to keep him locked up because I realized that what was living behind that boy's eyes was purely and simply... evil.

The tricorne is a style of hat that was popular during the 18th century, although actually not called a "Tricorne" until the mid 1800s; prior to the 18th century hats of this general style were referred to as "Cocked Hats". At the peak of its popularity, the Cocked Hat varried greatly in style and size, and was worn not only by the aristocracy, but also as common civilian dress, and as part of military and naval uniforms. The hat was typically worn with the point facing forward, though it was not at all unusual for soldiers or sailors, who would often rest a rifle or musket on their left shoulder, to wear the tricorne offset to one side to allow better clearance.

Statement by Family of Corporal Nathan Cirillo – October 24, 2014


October 28, 2014

No, No, Honey. You're Supposed To Dress As Something You're Not Every Other Day.

True arches were known by a number of civilizations in the Ancient Near East, the Levant, and Mexico, but their use was infrequent and mostly confined to underground structures such as drains where the problem of lateral thrust is greatly diminished. An early example of a voussoir arch appears in the Greek Rhodes Footbridge. The ancient Greeks introduced the arch in Italian visible today in the south of the peninsula and in Sicily. The ancient Romans learned the arch from the Etruscans, refined it and were the first builders to tap its full potential for above ground buildings.

The usual approach to sexy Halloween costumes is to take something neutral and make it sexy, but the reliable sexsmiths at Playboy have come up with yet another option for this Halloween – the Playboy Playmates dressing up as sexy versions of the least sexy celebrities imaginable. Yes, John Oliver, we're looking directly at you.

Since Google Streetview used photos that were taken strictly during the daytime, for this next challenge I suspect I'm going to need a local Las Vegan to help me identify where this photo was taken, in relation to the Aria casino. Show me on Streetview!

Today's tattoo challenge - Not hebrew. Maybe sanskrit? Noah

That one was too easy, it's Arabic, one of the official languages of Israel Toby

Okay fair enough, now who the hell can read Arabic and tell me what the hell does her tattoo says?

So there's a 31 year old Filipino TV Host that has a very rare talent. He is really good with makeup transformation. And he applies it on himself in order to make him look like famous female celebrities. Wait, what? Why would you want to be Jennifer Lawrence or why would you want to be Nicole Kidman? Does it actually make masturbating more fun? Well anyway, if you take a look at these pictures you'll realize this guy does a fantastic job with his makeovers, to the point it's scary.

Dasani was launched in the UK on 10 February 2004. The product launch was labelled "a disaster", a "fiasco" and a "PR catastrophe". Early advertisements referred to Dasani as "bottled spunk" or featured the tagline "can't live without spunk". These slogans were used seemingly oblivious to the fact that spunk is slang for semen in the UK. In line with the 2012 Summer Olympics and being the official drink sponsor, Coca-Cola decided not to reintroduce the Dasani brand to the UK market, and purchased the Morpeth-based Abbey Well bottler in 2008, branded under the Schweppes brand name to provide a locally-sourced water brand for the event.

So for my birthday I like to buy myself another gun. I ended up with a used coach gun. And how stoked am I to find out its the same as the one and only....... BOOMSTICK! Now I need to find a way to mount my chainsaw on my arm. -Ryan

Well, I hope I don't completely rain on your parade here, but in all actuality, Ash isn't holding a Remington double barrel, it's actually a Brazilian made Stoeger. And assuming you've bought it more to fuck around with -- as opposed to actually defend your farm or shoot Deadites with -- might I recommend some low recoil buckshot? Options for low recoil 12 gauge starts on page 11, specifically look for "Rio Royal Low Recoil 00 BUCK 12 ga 2 3/4" 250 rnd/case for $107.99" And don't worry, Rio shotgun ammo is made in Spain and always gets good reviews. Catch the right sale and on occasion pick up a case of 250 shells for around $90-$95; I always grab a couple just because the low recoil stuff works well in my coach. Also, wow, the years have not been particularly kind to Embeth Davidtz.

Hey you know how sometimes guys will get all covered with tattoos and then be all like, "Don't judge me, that's discrimination." Well, girls can do it, too.


October 27, 2014

I'd Like To Imagine She Did That Herself Using A Mirror, And Meant To Say DOG.

Over time, passion gets lost when it comes to intimate encounters in the bedroom. This problem isn't just experienced by men but by women as well. In fact, some studies have found that more women are unsatisfied with their sex life as compared to men. This is the reason female enhancement supplements have also become very popular. Velextra for Women claims to be the future of sexual enhancement for women. It is designed to deeply intensify sexual arousal and sensations for a significant improvement in sexual satisfaction.

Wintercroft Masks arrive in your inbox as PDF files, which you then print out on either regular paper or card stock. After that, you just cut and fold according to the instructions, and if you're at all proficient in the area of motor skills you should have a cool, interesting -– and yes, really fucking creepy -- mask that's perfect for Halloween.

In Skyrim's epic world of Tamriel, there are many things to find, including books of ancient magic, vampires and werewolves, and of course, dragons. Who knew it was also the go-to place for some of the best cosplay around?

True story bro: If you properly shuffle a deck of playing cards, chances are that exact order has never been seen before in the entire history of the universe; the odds are 1:80,658,175,170,943,900,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, if you want to get all technical and shit.

Okay, this is where my public school education is failing me in the culture department. Is this tattoo written in Hebrew?

It's an incline sit up style bench. It's just folded. It maybe an older model because of the logo is different. Ryan

re that exercise equipment is just a situp bench, standing on its end/upside down. Thanks for covering the events in Canada yesterday. We have to deal with the same terrorist shit as the US...its just a little more obvious now. airdave (Ontario Canada)

Ahhh, poor Canada. You guys had a rough couple of days there. But like the old saying goes, you can't experience joy if you've never felt pain.

Bengt Holmstrom is a retired Swedish ice hockey left winger who played for the Detroit Red Wings of the National Hockey League, where he has won four Stanley Cup championships. Holmström was known for standing in front of the goal to screen the opposing goaltender. Because he had to withstand hits from pucks as well as his opponents in this position, he wore several extra pads to protect his body. Because of his obstructive playing style and close proximity to goalies and the crease, Holmstrom attained a reputation, and was often charged with goaltender interference penalties as well as occasionally having goals incorrectly called back because of his proximity to the crease.


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